New York girls TV Show

Sex and the City took a look at women living the high life in the Big Apple, but Bravo shined a light on the reality side of it with Gallery Girls. In August 2012, Bravo launched the eight-episode ... Created by Ilana Glazer, Abbi Jacobson. With Ilana Glazer, Abbi Jacobson, Hannibal Buress, Arturo Castro. Broad City follows two women throughout their daily lives in New York City, making the smallest and mundane events hysterical and disturbing to watch all at the same time. A children's television show in Denmark has turned heads after the New York Times wrote a glowing profile of the show's practice of exposing kids to naked adults ostensibly as a way to prevent ... The Los Angeles native starred in her first experimental TV broadcast in Hollywood a few months before NBC pulled off its broadcasting feat at the 1939 New York World’s Fair in Queens. “Girls” has worn out its welcome. The critically acclaimed HBO series, which returns Sunday for its third season, is under fire for its continued depiction of New York as a haven for losers ... Of all the Gallery Girls, Lisa seemed to have the strongest work ethic.The New York native maintained a full-time job at high-end luxury concierge service Four Hundred while juggling an internship ... “Girls” is an example of the strides TV shows have made in illustrating New York City living with a degree of realism. But it still falls short of getting it just right. Created by Elizabeth Meriwether. With Zooey Deschanel, Jake Johnson, Max Greenfield, Hannah Simone. After a bad break-up, Jess, an offbeat young woman, moves into an apartment loft with three single men. Although they find her behavior very unusual, the men support her - most of the time. I love GIRLS! This show is so funny, intelligent and real. Filled with a strong, funny, quircky interesting feminist cast, written by a talented ambitious young woman, what else could you want for a HBO comedy! I am so happy I finally ordered season 1& 2 of this amazing show. It's been more than two years since Bravo aired the final episode of Gallery Girls in October 2012. Fans of the show—which followed seven women trying to make it in the cutthroat New York City ...

A little wine, a roast chicken, and some ghost hunters.

2012.10.01 16:05 A little wine, a roast chicken, and some ghost hunters.

Discuss all the Real Housewives franchises by Bravo TV with us! You are in the right place for: Real Housewives of Atlanta Beverly Hills New Jersey New York City Orange County Melbourne Miami Toronto Vancouver Potomac Dallas Salt Lake City Vanderpump Rules Summer House Southern Charm Below Deck Ladies of London Mob Wives and more!
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2020.09.18 09:23 JAMESFAULKNERSS Top TV Shows To Watch On Amazon Prime Video

Amazon Prime Video has expanded its library service and offers free streaming of movies and TV shows. The platform has grown into a media vault formidable enough to challenge other streaming platforms like Netflix and Hulu.
And if you are trying to find the best shows to watch on Amazon Prime? Fret Not! We have got you covered with our list of the best shows streaming on Amazon Prime.
📷 Alias (2001 – 2006)
Genre – Spy, Drama, Science Fiction
IMDb Rating – 7.6 / 10
Number of Episodes – 105
The story revolves around a Sydney Bristow, an undergraduate student approached by someone who claims to work for the CIA and offers a job as an agent. She accepts the job and fights several rival agents and terrorists while keeping it a secret from her friends.
The critics have well-received the series, and it has been considered the best TV program in 2003 by the American Film Institute.
30 Rock (2006 – 2013)
Genre – Sitcom
IMDb Rating – 8.2 / 10
Number of Episodes – 139
The story is about Liz Lemon, head writer of a comedy show who has to deal with an arrogant new boss while also trying to run a successful television show. Lemon constantly has her hands full, juggling interference in the process of trying to salvage her personal life.
The Americans (2013 – 2018)
Genre – Drama
IMDb Rating – 8.4 / 10
Number of Episodes – 75
The Americans is a period spy thriller that is set during the Cold War. It follows the story of Elizabeth and Philip Jennings, who pose as an American couple and carry out their lives in the simplest manner while at night, they weave a web of confidants and historical figures from the war as spies.
The show received a couple of awards and became one of the rare drama shows to receive two Peabody Awards.
Fleabag (2016 – 2019)
Genre – Comedy-drama
IMDb Rating – 8.7 / 10
Number of Episodes – 12
Fleabag is a British comedy-drama series written and created by Phoebe Waller-Bridge, who also stars as the show’s main lead.
The show centers around Fleabag, a free-spirited woman based in London who frequently breaks the fourth wall to provide exposition and monologues.
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (Since 2017)
Genre – Comedy-drama
IMDb Rating – 8.7 / 10
Number of Episodes – 26
Marvelous Mrs. Maisel is set in 1958 and revolves around the lead character Miriam Midge Maisel who, according to her has a perfect life with her husband and two kids in the Upper West Side, Manhattan. She supports her husband through everything until one night when her husband leaves her for another girl. That’s when Miriam discovers her comedic talent and decides to be a stand-up comedian, which is a highly male-dominated profession.
The Good Wife (2009 – 2016)
Genre – Drama
IMDb Rating – 8.6 /10
Number of Episodes – 156
The show focuses on Alicia Florrick (Julianna Margulies) who has been a good wife to her husband, a former state attorney. She stays at home and looks after her family, but after here ends up in the jail in a corruption scandal, Florrick needs to do something to provide for her family.
The Good Wife won several awards for Outstanding Drama and the performances in the show as well have been highly appreciated.
Hunters (Since 2020)
Genre – Dark comedy
IMDb Rating – 7.2 / 10
Number of Episodes – 10
Hunters is inspired by several real Nazi hunters but does not serve as a specific representation of any of them. The show follows a diverse group of Nazi hunters who have been living in New York City in 1977 and are conspiring to create a Fourth Reich in the U.S.
The Office (2005 – 2013)
Genre – Sitcom
IMDb Rating – 8.9 / 10
Number of Episodes – 201
The Office is a mockumentary on a group of typical office workers and their boss who portray the daily antics of a workplace. The show is an adaptation of the British series of the same name and is one of the most-watched and loved shows in the comedy genre.
Suits (2011 – 2019)
Genre – Drama
IMDb Rating – 8.5 / 10
Number of Episodes – 134
The American legal drama series, Suits, is set in a fictional New York City-based law firm and follows a talented and intelligent college drop our, Mike Ross, who starts working as an associate under Harvey Specter without having attended a law school. Harvey is the best lawyer in the city, and Mike complements him perfectly in the job.
Suits received positive reviews from the fans and the viewers while also winning several awards and nominations.
This concludes the list of shows that you should consider adding to your Amazon Prime Video watchlist.
Source-Watch On Amazon Prime Video
submitted by JAMESFAULKNERSS to u/JAMESFAULKNERSS [link] [comments]


2020.09.17 17:27 PolarityRage Mother Knows Best: Rescue

Veronica’s Perspective

The misty visage of Cassandra and Brandon faltered as the rock soared through it.
“Did you say something, Veronica? We could’ve sworn we heard something.” Callum turned from the entrance to the cave he was staring at. Thankfully, he was a bit slow and missed the mist fading away. Now, hopefully, Cassandra would be a good little soldier and listen to her command.
“I said let me go, Callum,” Veronica lied easily as she once again struggled against her bindings. He couldn’t know Cassie had contacted her with an Iris message.
“Now, now. Is that any way to treat your family? Especially after what you did to us?”
“Us? Callum, you’ve gone mad. There never was any us.”
“No, no, not you and me, Veronica. Arthur and I.”
“This is about Arthur’s death? That wasn’t my fault!” Veronica protested.
LIAR! You left me for dead! You could’ve stayed to help me fight. You could’ve done something!” Callum responded in a gravelly voice.
“You weren’t there, Callum! You can victimize me however you want. I tried to get Arthur to run from the Cyclopes lair with me, and he refused. I knew we weren’t strong enough to take it. I knew that the demigod with us was already dead. The Cyclopes mimicked your crying voice to lure him in. He ran in, and I didn’t follow. At the end of the day, it was his choice!”
“You promised me you’d fight by my side no matter what. We had an Oath!” The same gravelly voice accused.
“I made a promise to Arthur! And, it was a foolish promise made by a scared little girl. It was not a Styx Oath and it wasn’t a promise to you-” Veronica trailed off as the pieces seemed to fit together.
Callum looked like his vitality was ruined. He talked in the plural despite being alone. He was talking about things that only Arthur knew. Then, there was the strange sound of his voice like his vocal cords seemed to clash with the words he was trying to say...
“You should know better! Promises are everything to the children of Horkos. Oaths and punishing those who break them is all we will ever know.” “No, Callum... You didn’t.” Veronica’s jaw dropped as she realized that somehow Callum had forcefully taken Arthur’s soul as a second passenger in his body.
“I had to! You ran away. You ran away from Arthur and you ran away from me! When you guys didn’t return, I went to the Lair to investigate. There was just one Cyclopes left and he was eating Arthur! I killed him, but I was too late. I couldn’t even summon his spirit to me.”
“Then how?” Veronica asked. She knew if she kept Callum talking she would buy herself time to figure a way out of her situation.
“Does it matter? You see the result. And now, we’ve finally found you, Veronica. It wasn’t easy. We found the records saying that you died in a car crash, but we couldn’t find your spirit among the dead. Of course, you’d be the dramatic type to fake your death.”
Veronica was at a loss. How did the once shy twin she spent years traveling with become this monster? How did he become so desperate to take Arthur’s soul inside his own body? She still was trying to escape her bindings… She just needed to keep them engaged a while longer.
“You think I don’t regret what happened to you, Arthur? I live with that guilt every day. I wasn’t strong enough to beat several Cyclopes and I knew it, so I ran. I ran and ran, and I never stopped. I focused on getting stronger every day. Strength would’ve saved you. Strength would’ve made me able to follow you into the cavern. I was weak then, and I made sure I wasn’t weak again. I was too weak to ever face you, Callum. I made offerings to Iris to make sure you could never contact me. I buried everything in monster hunting. It wasn’t the same, but with every monster I killed, I tried to use that pain to heal a bit of the hurt I felt. It worked for a bit, but then it stopped,” Veronica took a ragged breath.
“Is that what you tell yourself so you can sleep at night, Veronica? We trusted you. Together, we could have easily won. Yet, you left us for dead. You didn’t help me. You left me alone to fend for myself.”
“Fine, you’ll never believe me then. Why am I here?”
“You took everything from us. It’s time we return the favor.” Callum towered over Veronica and kicked her in the side. She let out an involuntary groan in pain. He sneered before continuing, “It took years for us to figure out how to make you pay. Finally, we decided on an eye for an eye. We would make a fair trade- a sibling for a sibling. Arthur died, so Mary had to die. Just our luck, we found out that the two of you were dead: Mary in a house fire and you in a car crash. We moved on with our lives. Then we saw that girl, Cassandra, in the Olympics. Who knew Hephaestus TV would be so useful? She looks so much like you and bears your last name. Not only that, but she also fought those Amazons with your golden sword. We didn’t have to be children of Athena to realize it. It’s time we destroyed your family as you destroyed ours. After that it was easy, we set the bait. Your greed always preceded you. We took the highest paying jobs regardless of who they were for, whenever you were in charge. Eight thousand drachma to retrieve an artifact that’s all it took with you.”
“You’re delusional,” Veronica tried to calmly lie but the pounding of her heart inside her chest gave it away. Veronica made a silent futile prayer that her daughter would understand her thoughts, Please, Cassandra. Listen to me about this. Run back to Camp Half-Blood and hide. I don’t care. Just go with your cousin and get far away from here.
“Why don’t we get this family reunion started? Your daughter has quite the trip ahead of her to get from New York to here,” Callum spoke with cold certainty before walking over to where a trickle of water dripped down the cavern wall. He shined his light in it and sent rainbow droplets falling.
“Iris, messenger of the Gods, show us Cassandra Davenport,” Callum called as he threw a drachma into the drops. The water shimmered for a moment before dissolving as an orange inferno swallowed it. The misty form evaporated into a thousand motes of color.
You!” Callum turned on his heel and stormed over to Veronica with a fist clenched. Upon reaching her, he drew his fist back and thrust it forward into Veronica’s mouth. Veronica let out a cry of pain as the taste of copper filled her mouth. Her lip must’ve split open from the impact. She spat out a bloody loogie to the side. Once the pain dulled to a throbbing, she could think clearly. Cassie would have answered and talked with her on Iris Message. So, Brandon must’ve seen it and destroyed it. The fact that he was so quick to destroy the Iris Message also meant he wasn’t driving and likely knew that Veronica would’ve been used for leverage. It seemed her daughter and nephew both were incapable of following simple directions. Callum and Arthur would get their little family reunion despite her best efforts. So, she would focus on stalling them for the time being.
Callum was fuming as he stood over Veronica, his fist raised again in demand of an answer, “Why did she destroy the Iris Message? How did you contact her? I took your phone and smashed it!”
Veronica smiled. Her teeth were red from the blood and her lips hurt from the punch, but she pushed through it all and laughed at Callum.
“Funny, isn’t it? After all this time, I’m still one step ahead of you. Back when we ran together, it was always me trailblazing, Arthur struggling to keep up, and you lagging. Over time, I devoted myself to strength and you devoted yourself to the past. The gap between us has only grown. Even now, I’m several steps ahead of you,” Veronica lied. She knew Brandon and Cassie were coming and that Callum wouldn’t kill her. She also knew that Callum was under the impression that she’d come alone to the cavern. Now, she just had to weaponize his plan against him.
Callum grabbed his hair in clumps and shook his head over and over again, “We were so close! We knew that if the price was right Veronica would come. We knew where her daughter was. We caught her. We had everything planned! How? How? How?”
As Callum fell into a frantic panic, Veronica felt something crawling across her hand. She jolted in surprise to shake it free only to be shocked by whatever it was in turn. She turned her head slightly to see a small brown spider resting on her hand. The creature raised one of its mechanical legs in a wave before tapping
.-- . .- .-. . -. . .- .-. -... -.-- -....- .--. --- .-- . .-. ... ..--..
At least Cassandra remembered that Veronica knew Morse Code. A shame Cassie never did pick it up. Once again, she found herself thankful that Mary’s prideful son was here. According to the automaton, the two of them were nearby, had evaded sight yet, and were curious of powers that the demigod might have. Tapping out everything behind her back with chained hands wasn’t ideal so she managed a single word question in response. If Brandon and Cassie could hear through this creature, it’d be easier to just sneak the answers into her conversation with Callum.
.... . .- .-. ..--..
The creature almost immediately sent back:
-.-- . ...
After the first letter, Veronica started to talk.
“Another one of your famous temper tantrums, huh, Callum? I see being possessed by Arthur did nothing to mellow that out. Are they like before, when the shadows went berzerk around you because you can’t maintain control of your umbrakinesis? Gods, I hope so. As soon as my chains are destroyed I will slit your throat and watch as you drown in your blood. Or, are you going to curse everything you can by binding it with oaths to your father? How’s that worked out for you when you used your own body as a catalyst? Maybe your temper tantrum will spawn a few new skeletons. As if I’ve ever had trouble destroying those.”
“You, shut the fuck up!” Callum hollered before slamming his elbow into Veronica’s forehead. Veronica’s head swam in circles as she tried to stay conscious. It was a losing battle though and Veronica’s head rolled forwards.
**Cassie’s Perspective
Brandon clamped a hand down on her shoulder to try to keep her hidden behind the fallen rocks they were crouching under, “Cassie don’t…”
For all her complex feelings about her mother, Cassie couldn’t stand the sight before her. Sure, she rebelled against the Dorian way her mother raised her. What teenager wouldn’t? Sure, the way Veronica raised her was harsh. But, it kept her alive. Sure, she didn’t have the best relationship with her parents. What demigod did? That didn’t mean she wanted ill to fall on her mother. That certainly didn’t mean she would wait idly with her thumb up her ass while this haggard man took out his frustrations on her mother. It was only natural for her to attack. Cassie ignored Brandon’s warning and threw the spear of Geryon with deadly aim at the man who just knocked her mother out. Without turning to look, Calum forced the darkness of the cave to gather in a mass in the path of the spear. It sank into the darkness before clattering to the ground harmlessly.
“Do that… Cassie don’t do that was the full thing. Gods fucking damn it,” Brandon muttered, though apparently only to himself. Cassie had already hurdled over the rocks with spear and shield in hand and eyes gleaming red. The Spear of Geryon she had previously thrown had since returned to the one she was carrying.
“She was here, she was here, and we didn’t know! Arthur, brother let’s kill her. It’s a shame Veronica couldn’t behave herself and watch the show, but it is of little consequence. Envy, spirits who broke their Oaths in the name of Envy lend your powers to me!” Callum brandished his whip at the side giving Brandon a good look at the metal interwoven like bits of broken glass. As he did, figures of darkness matching his appearance became corporeal on either side of him.
Brandon quickly stood up as his gear materialized on his person before calling out a warning, “Cassie, that’s Stygian Iron. One cut and it’s game over. Be careful. You can handle the person, I’ll take care of the shadows.”
Cassie hardly registered the words of her cousin. He could handle the shadows. Her sole focus was ripping Callum limb from limb. He captured her mother, beat her, and looked at her with pure malice. Instinctively, the daughter of Ares Miaiphonos knew that she had to spill this demigod’s blood before he spilled hers. She felt the heat radiating from behind her as Brandon engaged a shadow. That didn’t matter. She had a score to settle.
Her knuckles clenched white around her spear before she threw it with Ferrokinesis guiding it to the neck of Callum. The Spear of Geryon’s divine magic activated the second it left her hand leaving an exact copy in her grip. Unfortunately, the thrown spear was once against the darkness. The shadows seemed to swirl around the spear before it was thrown back at her. Thankfully, she could still control the spear and sent it clattering to the side of her before forcing it to magically dissolve.
Cassie was seeing a pattern, but throwing the spear was way less taxing than manipulating shadows. The godly enchantment Ares placed on the spear of Geryon would outlast any darkness he controlled. She just had to force him to overwork his powers while conserving her energy. She didn’t need Ferrokinesis to guide her shots, her mother had made sure of that.
With that in mind, she quickly developed a strategy. The Spear of Geryon would be thrown three times in rapid succession. Each time he blocked it with a shadow, she would recall it before it could be used against her. Rinse and repeat. His energy would have to give out at some point, right?
Whatever the case, she would make sure Callum got no time to breathe, no time to recover, and no time to counter.
Spear one, shadow shield, recall spear
Spear two, shadow shield, recall spear
Spear three, shadow shield, recall spear.
Repeat
The dance continued, Callum didn’t get a chance to strike out with his whip. Whatever Brandon was doing was keeping the shadows off of her. The shadows around Callum seemed to be fading in intensity. Or was that her imagination? No, there was no time to think. The attacks couldn’t let up.
The Spear of Geryon had yet to shed blood. Her promise to her father had yet to be fulfilled. She would be sure to change that. The stalemate finally seemed to be going her way. Callum hadn’t noticed it yet, but Veronica was beginning to stir. Not only that but the previous bands of umbrakinesis that shackled her arms had since vanished.
Cassie wasn’t going for a small victory though. Callum would be overwhelmed before she stopped. A few spear throws later, and Callum had dropped his spear to focus on using both hands to summon walls of darkness before him. It didn’t matter.
Three more rapid-fire spear throws were aimed at Callum’s chest. Once again, he managed to summon darkness to block all the blasts. Though this time, Callum took a step back. Then another. Then another. Each onslaught seemed to force him to retreat. The shadows were still holding up, but Callum looked rattled. The older demigod was visibly shaking.
“No! No! This isn’t right! That thing isn’t human! That thing is a monster. It will kill us. We must escape,” Callum lunged backward as shadows once again condensed around him to block a spear blow.
“Fear! Those who broke their promises in the name of fear, cover me. Cover one cowering in fear, so he can live to run from a demon for another day!” The shadows started to converge around Callum and Brandon let loose a string of curses. The creatures he had been facing had evidently been destroyed, but Cassie had been too focused on Callum to know when or how.
“Shadow travel! Stop him!” Brandon was frantically struggling with a crossbow, but he wouldn’t have it loaded in time.
Cassie once again fired off her spear. Callum likely couldn’t shadow travel and defend…
Unfortunately, her thoughts proved wrong. Another black shield emerged as the shadows seemed to slow with swallowing the demigod.
That gave Veronica all the opening she needed. Callum hadn’t noticed her during Cassie’s onslaught. She managed to grab his whip and lashed out with the weapon. The tip made contact with Callum’s palm and he let out a guttural scream, “ARTHUR!
The shadows swallowed him and the three were left alone in a cave. Veronica hastily dropped the whip she was holding. Cassie heard it clatter to the ground but paid her mother no mind. She threw another spear at where Callum had been standing moments ago. It lodged itself in the wall between two cracks where she left it.
“Coward,” Cassie hissed as she spat on the ground, “Why did he run? I wasn’t finished with him yet!”
“Cassie, turn off the fear aura. He’s gone. He’s not coming back,” Brandon commented as he gestured for her to look down. She followed her gaze to see her entire body was shrouded in a crimson light.
“Why is he doing this? He did this when he claimed me, but I didn’t spill blood. I didn’t earn his favor. The coward ran away before I got to kill him for what he did!.”
“Cassie, I don’t think it was Ares. As you fought, I saw the red get stronger around you, and I felt my heart quicken as fear set in. I believe one of your powers is combat-related phobokinesis.”
The words hardly registered as Cassie continued to glare at the spot where Callum had been standing. She felt a reassuring hand on her left shoulder. She shuddered and turned to see Veronica smiling. It looked more like a grimace with her busted lip and swollen eye, but the sentiment was unmistakable.
“Not bad, Cassie. Not bad.”
That was probably the closest her mother had ever gotten to complimenting her. Cassie felt her heart swell with pride. The daughter of Ares took a step forward and wrapped her mother in a hug who returned it with her one arm. Behind Cassie’s back, she pointed to the whip and made a deliberate cutting motion before returning her daughter’s hug.
Brandon knelt beside Callum’s whip and shuddered before putting on gloves to handle it. A hole of fire opened up in the ground to swallow the whip as the boy muttered a prayer to Phlegethon.
When Cassie pulled away, she forced her spear out of the wall and returned it to her back, “Let’s go find him. Fear powers or not. He ran away while we were fighting and I’ll make him regret that.”
That night- Brandon’s perspective
Once they returned to the hotel room, Veronica had explained everything- well, almost everything. He knew there were secrets she was still keeping. If she was a demigod worth anything, she wouldn’t share her whole hand. Still, it was enough. Callum, their past, his brother boosting him, the trap he set.
Cassie had just left the hotel room to head to the pool to try Iris Messaging Tristan. Brandon had given her a drachma and planted the idea in her head so he could talk with his Aunt Veronica in private. She seemed to realize he was planning to as well. As soon as Cassie left, Veronica looked expectantly.
“That whip you picked up. It was cursed. I had to put on enchantment nullifying gloves to handle it. I doubt you have that luxury. It was hard to decipher exactly what it did. It seemed like Callum had recursed it dozens of times over the years. Either way, you have some price to pay.” Brandon spoke simply. He knew Tristan and Cassie wouldn’t be talking forever so he had to keep this brief.
“I know,” Veronica responded simply as she balled then unfurled the fingers on the hand that had grabbed the whip.
“Why’d you do it then?” Brandon asked,
“I- I didn’t want Cassandra to suffer the way I had. Callum was twisted over the years, but the core of what he said was true. Had I been strong enough to stand by Arthur, he would likely still be alive today. Had I been strong enough to face Callum, he wouldn’t have gone down that path. I dedicated my life to strength and hunting monsters. I thought every monster that I killed would somehow atone for saving Arthur. When Mary died, I couldn’t bear the funeral. I had already gotten my demigod family killed and then my little sister died as well. I had nothing. I saw you once when you were a baby and you reminded me so much of her. I still wasn’t strong enough to face that.”
Brandon was quiet for a few moments before turning his focus back to the curse, “You don’t want me to tell Cassie about it do you?”
“No.”
“I won’t then.” Brandon nodded his head once in understanding.
“Brandon, I know you owe me zero favors, but if you wouldn’t mind… Look after Cassie for me while she’s at Camp Half-Blood. The girl will be the best of us all one day.”
Brandon nodded once, “Then, you’re letting her go back?”
Veronica nodded in turn, “I need to see about getting the curse removed without her knowing, and I get the feeling she will better be able to live up to her father’s expectations at Camp Half-Blood in the coming weeks.”
Brandon let out a sigh, “She told you about Dionysus vanishing then?”
Veronica once again nodded when the lock jingled as Cassie went to open the door. As soon as she opened it, Brandon looked her way and made obnoxious kissing noises.
“Is Bird Brain still as lovestruck as ever?” He teased before ducking to avoid the keys Cassie had just chucked at his head.
OOC: Huge thanks to fireyrage and Shining_Bright for their help proofreading.
Cassie and Brandon will return tonight! And yes, I have an IC explanation for why this took three weeks.
submitted by PolarityRage to CampHalfBloodRP [link] [comments]


2020.09.16 17:53 ll_JoMaLeX_ll (Selling) 4K / HD / SD MOVIE COLLECTIONS CODES

(Selling) 4K / HD / SD MOVIE COLLECTIONS CODES



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I Am Legend / MA $6
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_

4K / UHD. Bundle

007 James Bond ( Daniel Craig ) Collection / VUDU. $20

Hunger Games 4 Movie collection / iTunes. $15

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007 James Bond Ultimate Collection ( 24 Movies ) / VUDU. $100

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( 300 and 300: Rise of the Empire )

2 Movie Pack / MA. $10
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6 Movie Pack ( Nicholas Cage ). $25
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Both Collection for $15 ( NOT EACH )
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Die Hard Collection / MA. $22

Divergent Trilogy. $10

Expendables Trilogy. $10

Hunger Games 4 Movie collection / Vudu. $12

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Madagascar Ultimate Collection / MA. $20
( Madagascar / Madagascar 2 / Madagascar 3 / Penguins of Madagascar)

Planet of the Apes 9 Movie Collection / MA. $30

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Rob Zombie Triple Feature (Bundle) / Movieredem / Vudu. $7
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Shrek The Ultimate Collection / MA. $25
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2020.09.16 16:45 IndieheadsAOTY Album of the Year 2014 #16: Spoon - They Want My Soul

Album of the Year 2014 #16: Spoon - They Want My Soul
Hello everyone and welcome back once again to Album of the Year 2014, the daily write-up series for the month of September where we bring you a new write-up each day from a different indieheads user talking about their favorite album of 2014. Up today, the former head of the Canadian Indie Rock Canon, rccrisp, is up swinging today talking about Spoon's 2014 album, They Want My Soul.
August 5, 2014 - Loma Vista
Listen:
Spotify
Bandcamp
Apple Music
Background
Formed in the Mid 90’s and coming into their own in the back half of the decade’s post Grunge landscape, Spoon, formed in Austin, Texas with SingeGuitarist Britt Daniel and drummer Jim Eno meeting as part of the band The Alien Beats. The band name was chosen in homage to the German Krautrock band Can whose song “Spoon” was the theme song to American release of German film Jagged Edge. After singing with Matador Records, they released their debut LP Telephono, an album that had mixed reviews but showed signs of promise, allowing the band to sign a major label record deal. After singing with Elektra, Spoon recorded A Series of Sneaks, a better received sophomore effort that had poor sales causing the band to be dropped by their label.
After signing with Merge Records, Spoon would find its niche in the growing Indie Rock landscape of the 2000’s. Coincidentally the band would begin a string of stellar albums that today are considered modern classics. From the dark and experimental Girls Can Tell to the manic Kill the Moonlight to the pop sensibilities of Gimme Fiction and Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga, Spoon developed a reputation of being one of the most consistent bands in music, able to shift slide and adjust their sound with ease while not alienating their fans. After the (initially) lukewarm received Transference, Spoon would go on to release They Want My Soul after a four year break.
Review
In the world of rock music it’s hard to age gracefully. Look no further than the kids that made up the Meet Me In The Bathroom set. The only people sitting there waiting wistfully for the next Strokes album are a bunch of hipster boomers unwilling to let the past die. Sure enough the slow switch of indie rock from college slackers in too big sweaters to “too cool” young adults who took indie rock and turned it into a life style (Whole Foods, Urban Outfitters, PBR, American Spirits) should’ve known that as their music became co-opted by branding and identity, the bands that mode up that culture wouldn’t last past the zeitgeist explosion. Bands like the aforementioned Strokes, Interpol, Franz Ferdinand are five to six albums in and are only bringing back diminishing returns. Even the pillars of the genre, your TV On The Radios, Arcade Fires and, gasp, Animal Collective aren’t exactly releasing their best albums as they approach and ultimately pass middle age. Maybe it’s a reflection of the people who consumed this music in the first place (see: me, who is also aging horribly) but these bands were here for the sprint and, seemingly, not the marathon. Because in order to run a marathon you need steadiness, consistency. In Indie Rock you need to be Spoon.
Spoon’s biggest insult is that “they’re the most consistent band in Indie Rock.” It feels like a hollow knock against them and implies a lot of things that are simply untrue. For one it implies the band is “boring” which is patently false. You can’t tell me from their slick, only major label release A Series of Sneaks to the dark and brooding Girls Can Tell to the frantic Kill The Moonlight and trying to find the pop hooks in Gimmie Fiction and Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga that there isn’t a band that’s operating on another level, able to shift and shimmy their sound and yet retain an indescribable “Spoon-ness” that seeps through the songs. Even at their worst Spoon are less “egregiously bad” and more “off the centre of greatness.” Sure I haven’t listened to their debut Telephono in over a few decades but even when I did, I could hear the moments of greatness in its sludgy production. The criminally underrated Transference might dive a little too deep into its dark lo fi aesthetic but it contains some of Spoon’s best singular songs and is an absolute killer live. And while Hot Thoughts misses the mark it’s still refreshing to see a band try throwing a curve ball nine albums into their discography.
The other ridiculous notion about calling Spoon a “consistent band” is the insinuation the band hasn't released a stone cold classic. Kill The Moonlight and Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga definitely refute that claim, Girls Can Tell and Gimmie Fiction have a strong case but in my opinion They Want My Soul can stand up to any of Spoon's classic albums. Spoon began the sessions for recording They Want My Soul in 2013 after a lengthy hiatus which saw the band members splinter off to do their own projects. Frontman Britt Daniel said that after touring for Transference that the band felt “a little burned out” and for himself he needed “something that was going to reinvigorate me, to excite me abut working on new stuff again.” Daniel ended up forming The Divine Fits with Dan Boeckner of Wolf Parade, Jim Eno ended up doing production work for other bands, Rob Pope returned to his band The Get Up Kids and Eric Harvey recorded a solo album.
Sessions for They Want My Soul were broken up into two parts, with much of the early song writing involving Spoon going into sessions with no songs in mind, being assisted by Joe Chiarelli. Dan Friedman however, (notable for producing albums such as Yoshimi Battles The Pink Robot, Era Extraña and most of MGMT’s discography) is said to have the most impact on the album. As per Daniel, Friedman’s producing style “maxes everything out. We've never worked with somebody like that before - somebody with such a strong sense of their own style." Surely enough when most artists entering their 40’s are releasing their most down-to-earth, quiet albums, Spoon, whose sound while “guitar rock” never really leaned into the “rock” aspect, release their most powerful and bombastic album. On album opener “Rent I Pay” Eno lets his musical voice be heard, the punctuating snappy snares open and continue to pierce through the track as Daniel succinctly describes every day drudgery over a song that sounds like 60’s Classic Rock fused with the punk minimalism of Wire. The urgent and tense “Rainy Taxi” feels like re-contextualization of those frantic and nervous piano-centric tracks from Kill The Moonlight but mixed with a healthy dose of Chicago with its heart beat bass lines over squealing guitars.
Spoon’s strength has always been it’s been hard to pin point where their sound comes from, making their albums feel wholly their own even though elements of their influences pop and peak in. The ethereal Inside Out” feels like a continuation of much of what they explored on Transference but cleaned up while the synth tinged album ender “New York Kiss” is a crowd pleaser that hints at the upcoming more tech leaning Hot Thoughts. However Spoon feel at home on this album when they get back to their “indie rock roots.” Songs that feel like proper continuations of the sounds heard on Ga Ga Ga Ga and Gimmie Fiction like “Let Me Be Mine” which takes the energy of “The Underdog” but tempers it with darker moments that feel Transference-era as Daniel fights between the ideas of freedom and commitment. On title track “They Want My Soul” Daniel uses faith and astrological imagery (as well as a shout out to Jonathon Fisk, the name of Britt Daniel’s school age bully who had a song dedicated to him on Kill The Moonlight) as a metaphor for his public persona allowing people to take pieces of his life away from him. “Do You” feels like it has all the elements of the greatest Spoon songs (an absolutely catchy chorus, piano, hooks and Daniel’s intense vocal delivery) while the lyrics explores the traps and charms of memory and nostalgia. Daniel’s explores love, desires, intentions and self sabotage as he describes himself as a drunken mess in the first verse (“I was half out of the bag”), but follows up on the nature of imperfect love, one night stands (“Flipping back pages, unbuckling belts”) while accepting this is the nature of modern love (“Oh love, that’s the way love comes"),
Few artists ever get to this point, in their 40’s and releasing one of the best albums of their discography. But there’s still a hungriness that it palpable when listening to They Want My Soul. Time didn’t bog down Spoon, their relative success not becoming a hindrance on writing thought provoking music but instead taking everything they had worked on in the past and bringing it in the present. While their contemporaries were slowly releasing weaker albums Spoon can at least own the fact they had one last gasp, their familiar sound fitted for the modern Indie Rock landscape, being both familiar and expansive and evolving of their albums till that point.
Favorite Lyrics
There's intense gravity in you Yeah, there's intense gravity in you I'm just your satellite I'm just your satellite
  • "Inside"
Oh, love, that's the way love comes Do you, don't you know that that's the way love comes? Do you feel it black and blue? Oh, do you, do you, do you, do you?
  • "Do You"
Educated folk singers want my soul Jonathon Fisk still wants my soul I got nothing I want to say to 'em They got nothing left that I want All they want's my soul Yes, yes, I know it They want my soul
  • "They Want My Soul"
Right now I know no other time Right now I know no other place I say good night
  • "New York Kiss"
Talking Points
  • What do you think is Spoon’s “sound” if you think it can be easily described?
  • Seriously why are their songs featured in so many commercials?
  • Where does The Want My Soul rank for you in the band’s discography?
  • What other past decade releases from older established indie acts did you enjoy?
  • Where does They Want My Soul land on your 2014 list?
Thank you to rccrisp for their write-up! Up tomorrow, we've got Mko0987 scheduled to talk about TV Girl's debut album, French Exit. In the meantime, discuss today's album in the comments below where the schedule for the rest of the series will be posted.
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2020.09.16 11:13 Ava_arden9087 10 Shows You Should Watch If You Loved Gilmore Girl

10 Shows You Should Watch If You Loved Gilmore Girl
The American comedy-drama series focuses on the relationship between a single mother, Lorelai Gilmore, and her daughter, Rory. They are based in Stars Hollow, Connecticut, a fictional town that is filled with colorful characters.
The show was praised by the critics and the fans for cross-generational appeal and witty dialogues. The fandom has been growing in numbers which led to its status of a cult classic.
https://preview.redd.it/x5sfvel16hn51.jpg?width=310&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2a01a4c55c0b25054191bfdba0019c6529ea12ce
The show premiered its last episode years ago, and now after watching and re-watching all the episodes, you might want a few suggestions. So for all the Gilmore Girls fans, here are a few shows that you can watch for a similar vibe.
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
Genre – Comedy Drama, Period Drama
IMDb Rating – 8.7 / 10
Number of Episodes – 26
Set in 1950s Manhattan, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel centers around Miriam Midge Maisel, a sharp, funny, and energetic Jewish woman who is a cheerleader to her husband. Her perfect life is upended when her husband leaves her, and that is when she revaluates her life. Stumbling upon a nightclub stage one night, she discovers her comedic skills and decides to become a stand-up comedian.
You can stream all the episodes of the three seasons on Amazon Prime Video.
New Girl
Genre – Sitcom
IMDb Rating – 7.7/10
Number of Episodes – 146
The story is about Jess, an offbeat young woman who moves into an apartment loft with three single men after her break up. The show is fun and entertaining and worth a sunny weekend binge-worthy watch.
You can stream all the episodes of the seven seasons on Netflix.
Bunheads
Genre – Comedy-drama
IMDb Rating – 7.6/10
Number of Episodes – 18
The story about a Las Vegas showgirl, Michelle, who marries a man on a whim and moves to his town. She then starts to work with her mother-in-law there at her dance school as she was always extremely passionate about dancing. You can stream all the episodes of the first season on Hulu.
Parenthood
Genre – Family Drama, Serial Drama, Dramedy
IMDb Rating – 8.2/10
Number of Episodes – 103
The show revolves around the three generations of the Braveman family who have managed to keep their foundation intact by burying their problems for the sake of their children. The family faces different challenges, but the way they propose to deal with them is what keeps them together.
You can stream all the episodes of the six seasons on Hulu.
Jane the Virgin
Genre – Comedy-drama, Romantic Comedy, Satire
IMDb Rating – 7.8/10
Number of Episodes – 100
The story revolves around Jane, a catholic who works as a waitress in Miami. She later learns that during one of her visits to the doctor, she has been artificially inseminated. Jane decides to keep the baby but has to convince her mother for it.
You can stream all the episodes of the five seasons on Netflix.
Hart of Dixie
Genre – Comedy-drama
IMDb Rating – 7.7/10
Number of Episodes – 76
The show revolves around a newly graduated doctor, Zoe Hart, who is based in New York. She decides to follow in her father’s footsteps and become a cardio-thoracic surgeon, but her dreams fall apart, which leads to her accepting an offer from a stranger.
You can stream all the episodes of the four seasons on Netflix.
Insecure
Genre – Comedy-drama
IMDb Rating – 7.9/10
Number of Episodes – 34
The series follows the friendship of two modern-day black women, Issa Dee (Issa Rae) and Molly (Yvonne Orji) who go through racy tribulations on a usual basis.
You can stream all the episodes of the four seasons on HBO.
Never Have I Ever
Genre – Comedy-drama, Teen Drama
IMDb Rating – 7.9/10
Number of Episodes – 10
Never Have I Ever revolves around a teenage Indian American girl, Devi Vishwakumar who wants to change her social status after a horrible experience as a freshman. The show is believed to have been inspired by the life of Mindy Kaling, who is also the creator of the series.
You can stream all the episodes of season one on Netflix.
Schitt’s Creek
Genre – Sitcom
IMDb Rating – 8.4/10
Number of Episodes – 80
A formerly filthy-rich Rose family finds themselves broke suddenly and is reduced to living in a ramshackle, Schitt’s Creek which they had earlier bought as a joke. Now to rebuild their empire, they need to work from there itself.
The show is about family and love and how family influences change a person for good.
You can stream all the episodes of all the six seasons on Netflix, and Pop TV.
Dead to Me
Genre – Dark Comedy, Dramedy, Tragicomedy
IMDb Rating – 8 / 10
Number of Episodes – 20
Dead to Me is about a blossoming friendship between Jen (Applegate) and Judy (Cardellini) who face their shares of struggle while bonding together on these premises.
You can stream all the episodes of the two seasons on Netflix. These were some of the shows you will love if you are a fan of Gilmore Girls.
Source : https://setuppost.com/10-shows-you-should-watch-if-you-loved-gilmore-girl/
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2020.09.14 06:35 SnooEpiphanies7493 Anxiety, Loneliness, Depression how do you get out of this vicious cycle???

It's been a few months now... I kept inside for so long, I need to at least share my story somewhere.. Hopefully get some insights in this whole situation! Thanks in advance!
So the story begins maybe a few months ago, when I started getting some very light symptoms... some tingling in the legs (from the knee down) while walking. Kinda ignored it for a month, till one day, my calves got numb out of a sudden.. Went to ER, they said all is OK. Over next month followed up with Doctors, Neurologist and so on, just to get that "all is OK" from all of them.
I was obviously not feeling OK... Over the next 1-2 months, I started getting worse symptoms: dizziness, moments of super low-energy. More recently some GI issues, neck inflammation/swallowing issues (that come and go)...
As a result of all of this, my primary called out that all of this must be anxiety. But the odd part was that I was not feeling anxious at all while any of these symptoms were occurring. So I did not believe her.
I decided however to start talking to a therapist, just for the sake of it... And on paper, those symptoms do seem to align with Anxiety, so he also thought that I have anxiety. I slowly started giving them a bit more credit... but then I also kinda having some anxiety moments... Moments that I didn't notice before, at least not in this form. That made me wonder if the anxiety that I was now getting, was induced by this entire discussion about anxiety + me trying to deny it!?!?
At the same time, I did start to reflect a little bit on what really happened during the past months (before any symptoms showed up), and I stumbled over a few data points:
  1. I was over-working hard since pandemic started, always feeling like I could never finish what I started (providing me a sense of distress), since I always had to spend more time helping others than doing my own work
  2. In the nights, I would worry more about how to handle the rest of my work than concentrating on anything else
  3. In the weekends I had had time to motivate myself to do anything, even watch a TV show...
  4. I had almost no-one to see/interact with for months since March... Most of my friends were protecting themselves, and the ones who didn't, I was worried to meet up with them. All in all, I was barely interacting with 2 people, from time to time... But I wasn't noticing it much, since work covered most of my mental space anyway
  5. I moved out of my current apartment, thinking that I needed a change. Ended up in some temporary airbnbs, with no permanent place to stay in (thought that will be more fun to start hoping from one place to another, across the country)
Once I realized all of this, I started blaming all of my symptoms on: Lack of social interaction and stress at work.
Slowly my cognitive capabilities went down A LOT, I barely could do my job properly, being constantly hit by a rotation of the following symptoms => numbness in legs/arms, headaches, swallowing issues, hair loss, muscle weakness, neck pain.
This in turn made me panic more, since I had no idea what's going on with me. I started setting as a goal to start dating more, and try to find someone to spend more time with... Tried for a while in my current city, met a few girls, but noone I was really excited to be with.
There was one girl that I happened to keep talking with from the east coast (only met once last time I visited her city), and we kinda started connecting more and more over videochat. I decided mid-August to visit her and see how it goes.
This became in the back of my mind my saving grace, thinking that if we hit it off, I may finally have someone to spend time with and feel safer with...
At this point, took 3 weeks vacation and flew to meet her. After a few days we realized that we aren't really that compatible. Lesson learnt here, that meeting someone online is soo different than meeting in person. I felt anxious for a few days after that, since now I was stuck away from anyone else I know...
My reaction to all of this was to jump on all the dating apps, and try to get matches ASAP...
When it didn't work out in her city, decided to move to New York, thinking that there will be more opportunities here. And there were... I got many matches, but somehow I kept flaking Either while texting, either after a first date... This kept happening for 2 weeks.. Most of the day I felt anxious, and most likely I ended up writing too much to these girls. But being in this state, made it really had for me to concentrate on other things, chill down... It became a matter of life and death to meet someone (in my mind at least).
The live dates that I had, I managed to compose any of my anxiety, and they all went all. However, after each interaction, I got the "let's just be friends", which was a nice way to say good bye. Honestly I would've taken the friend-offer, if it was honest.
Today I reached a very low-point, feeling super depressed... I noticed that when I feel this low, even people around me react differently to what I say, like I'm some kind of weirdo. And I thought I'm keeping these feelings all inside, but clearly they are noticeable from outside too.
It just sucks that this seems like an infinite vicious cycle, I need friends/a partner to get off this state, but I can't get them if I'm in this state... How do you even get out of this infinite loop?
More scary is that today was the first day I ever had a scary thought, about jumping a window. It's not like I want to do it, I just scared of myself even thinking of that... And ignored that thought.
I'm back to work tomorrow, and I'm worried that the stress from work will come back, adding back on top of all the other issues.. Or at least temporarily will make me ignore all of this again... Till my bad physical symptoms may come back..
Yes I do have to mention, that since I got this hope "that I may be meeting someone here", and since I came to East Coast, my bad symptoms were reduced.. I may still get anxiety, but not the other scary ones I mentioned initially..
Thinking that I should just go clear up all my dating profiles, take a break from all of that, and clear up my mind. But how do I accomplish that? Especially that the work-stress will be back...
As much as I understand the lockdown, I can start to see these indirect consequences of long isolation. Wonder how many people are affected by this, or had similar issues as I did... Looking for any advice you may have...
Finally, I wish people would be able to tell easier when someone is going through all of this, and maybe not treat them so cold! I don't know if it's just the pandemic, but people seem much more cold to me now. You barely can even spark a random conversation with someone anymore :(
Sorry if this was too long... Or if it has any typos...
Thank you if you read this far. Thank you if you have any advice.
EDIT: reading others' posts, I forgot to mention another big symptom I had for a while. I had this out-of-body experience, which was very scary!! Almost fell like my mind was just a remote control for my body... The odd part was again, that I didn't feel anxious at that time...
I don't feel like I can talk with my friends about this, since they wouldn't understand... One other thing that I wish it happened, was that my friends would once check up on me... I always ask them if they're ok, but I never hear a pro-active question from them. And that accentuates my feeling of loneliness...
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2020.09.12 15:02 Sekio-Vias My enabler Aunt... my partner says I should talk to her because she neared died, and she has some genetic health info to share. I’ve been working on a letter to reinitiate contact, because she doesn’t understand why it stopped.

Please be advised of the following. S** R**** Enabling semi violent alcohol abuse. Dark thoughts and mentions of Su****. Stalking. So on...
Ps this is like 20 or so paragraphs. I’m also dyslexic. I’m also terrible at organizing thoughts. Also for future understanding there was a period where we thought I might be mildly autistic.
Alright here we go. Let me know what you think. My adoptive sister doesn’t think I’m being harsh enough.
...................................................
Ok. Silence from me has been long, and I think I finally know what I want to say. I haven’t for a long time without sounding too aggressive. So let me set the mood/tone. Hurt, disappointment, sadness, frustration,
Do you know why I didn’t speak to you till Christmas after I left my parents house? Because deep down I knew you would side with my mom, and believe there was no way your sister could have done anything wrong. Which would make me by default a lier or crazy. I was happier with no contact than to risk that.
So what do you do after we start talking? Lean rather hard into what seems a lot like guilt tripping me into talking to my mother for one. Then when (Partner) tries to tell you to please back off and why, you essentially tell him I’m lying or crazy.... He not legally my husband, but he acts as one to me. He’s the father of my child. Thanks for confirming my fears about ever coming to you. Thank you for the invalidation.
Now my had cousin is texting me. I want to believe it’s him... but sometimes he sounds more like a grown woman and it makes me curious.. I’m paranoid about my parents trying to get to me in any fashion. Terrified.
Why would I be paranoid? Well if I look back, my father first made me scared to sleep in my bedroom with out a weapon. That knife I got a bit before I left rested under my pillow every night. Next up my dads worst nightmare was me moving to New York and him having to stalking me. Followed by my own nightmare of him r*****g me as a child, and mommy dearest laughing at me when I told her. Then she turned on the tv to it. Speaking of mother. It’s her turn. She harassed my friend to the point she despised me. Told the cops she kidnaped me! Harassed her at her work and her parents. I had several police stations find me and had to turn them away. I just want them out if my life. Ok.
The final straws. My 21st birthday. I went out with a friend, and came back home to a location by location interrogation. A few days later I went out again, and turned my phone off because that was creepy. Well I lost track of time without my phone, and was 2 hours later than curfew. I expected a lecture. I didn’t expect to come home to my dad standing like a sentinel outside drunk. I didn’t expect to be cowering in the bathroom while he hit the door and yelled at me.
Do you have any idea about what I’m actually like? I have PTSD. Diagnosed. PTSD. Not just normal PTSD, complex PTSD, and another co-morbid one I don’t trust you to know about. Where did I get that from? Why does every male trigger me if they stand in the wrong place? Why did it require therapy to feel like I had the right to my own body? Why did I for years feel like the only thing of value I had to offer someone to survive was my body? Why am I terrified of authority figures? Why can’t I honestly tell you or anyone around you’re age that I love them? Why am I broken? Why do I have to glue each together the pieces? Why did I think about suicide or running away from home knowing full well it was risking getting abducted, raped, hopped up on drugs, sold, or murdered as a 12 year old to escape? Why did I keep a razor blade with me just in case I needed it, or a bottle of crushed up random pills? I also exhibit signs of growing up with a narcissistic parent. Lots of Autism like symptoms are also signs of that type of abuse. Everyone I have meet since I left has noticed it. Why didn’t they? Why didn’t you?
Because you love your sister. Because you don’t want her to be like that, and you don’t want to accept the fact that you never noticed. Maybe something else. I don’t really care. You don’t have to believe me, but if you want this relationship to continue on any capacity. You must at least pretend to care about my perspective on what happened to me, about my feelings, and wishes. And for the love of all that is good in this world and any other. Do not talk to my mother about me ever, for any reason. The fact of the matter is you, just like everyone else on this cruel world except Amarith, are optional. It’s your choice if you are going to be a good option for my life, or a bad one.
Ohh fun tidbit. My dad was hitting on (HS best friend) when she was a minor, and made comments about many really young and potentially too young girls. Forcibly hugged me and kissed me. Hugged 10 year olds without their permission away from their parents. All the while my mother did nothing.
I don’t believe you or anyone in my family actually loves me. You love the idea of your niece. But you didn’t know me to love me. Would you love who I actually am? I don’t know. I don’t know if I want to open myself up to find that out. I know my mother literally hates people like me. She is so cruel to people who are not like her behind closed doors. And no one knows. You have to know someone to love them. Family obligation is not love. And I’m done being trapped by it.
You know I was so scared I wouldn’t love my daughter. Thinking that part of me might be broken. Thank goodness I was wrong.
I want to talk to my cousins. I miss them. But I’m so terrified that it’s not them talking to me. I can’t risk it. I don’t want it to be you. I definitely don’t want it to be her.
I don’t want her to see pictures. Nothing. Especially not of (my 1 year old).
You know if you had died.. I don’t know how I would feel in all honesty. But I couldn’t risk coming to the funeral to see my parents. My wardens.
When considering taking gifts from my mother that I desperately needed for (1yo). All I could think of is how is she gonna use this against me. I broke down crying, because even years later. Across the country I felt trapped. Still!
When I came down to Florida to see you guys I had money, and a map layout in my phone to walk to a Mc Donalds, and 2 of (partner) families phone numbers. Just incase they showed up.
I’ve been working with a therapist for over a year on everything, and it’s not enough.. she had to help me find ones in the state we are moving to.
I’m gonna talk about Facebook for a minute. These soon to be enforced rules about name terrify me. If you notice I don’t really post pictures about myself, or (1yo). Often times I’m vague about location. I rarely if ever talk about before I moved out. All so that they can’t find me, while we have friends in common. Yes you can block people or make your profile private. That’s not good enough for me. I don’t trust their coding, because it’s failed me a few times. But I actually want to post about my life sometimes. I’m just to scared to.
I haven’t sent this.. because I figured what’s the point? All I’m gonna do is ruin your relationship to ether me, or your sister. Hurt you probably.. what’s the point? And why talk to you at all, when this is all I have to say.
I can’t just talk about my issues well. That’s something (partner), my therapist and I have been trying to work on for a long time. So... I don’t know.. how this is going to go when you get this.
And I think I’m gonna end on this last point. You really shouldn’t down play things people said happened behind closed doors without you. It’s not that you were skeptical even. You sounded like you were trying to debunk my entire life. That hurt. Bad.
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2020.09.12 11:11 JawaScrapper SUPERQUIZZ!! All the best quizz from Su'nday, Moa'nday & Yui'sday! PART 4: Pochette, Show knowledge & Cultural questions!

Hi, kitsune! Here are a selection of the best quizzes we had in the special member threads! This thread will be permanently linked in the special member threads, so it will be easy to come back to it. Here the links are permanent.
 
Good luck and have fun!
 
 
 
QUESTION (pochette 0)
Warm-up: What is a "pochette"?
 
 
QUESTION (pochettes 1)
First of all, let thanks again Ramstudel104 who provided the sleeves pics and the infos on them!
Ok let's start! To begin the quiz, just have a look to this sleeve
Nice one right?
So let's begin with a warm-up question (this one doesn't count really). From which ancient culture the artwork is inspired?
 
It was easy! wasn't it? Ok let's get serious! First question: Amongst the following answers, what song is featured in that single?
 
Actually this very single was a special edition released in July 2012 and came with a neckbrace for headbanging training! Do you know how this special edition was named?
 
Also, the sleeve artwork has a cool little feature: Something is actually written in hieroglyph (in the middle). Do you know what is spelled out here?
 
Ok, quick last question: Who is the figure you see at the bottom right of the artwork?
 
 
QUESTION (pochettes 2)
First let's say "Thank you" to Ramstudel104 who provided me the sleeves!
First of all, have a look to these 3 pictures: Picture 1 ; & Picture 2 ; & Picture 3.
Good? Ok; let's go then!
First question, an easy one for the warm up!
who is represented on these pictures?
 
Next question: the 3 sleeves are from three different versions of the Ijime, Dame, Zettai first press edition (2013). All these 3 singles feature IDZ (obviously), a special version of IDZ (air version) and one another song. Which one?
 
Last question: the 3 versions are named as "edition I", "edition D" and "edition Z". Ok, that's cool. But which one is which?
 
 
QUESTION (pochettes 3)
First of all, this quiz has a variable difficulty level, and you'll start with having a look to ONE of these pictures, according to the level of difficulty you pick.
 
 
You're good? Ok let's go for the first question! This is a partial "pochette" from a single. Do you know which song was featured on this single?
 
Next question: There are three editions of this single. One featuring Moa, one featuring Yui and one featuring Su. Do you know what is colour of the background on the Moa version? Here is a hint you may need: this colour is one of the colour associated to a girl in the Mini-Pati band from Sakura Gakuin.
 
Next question: This single is a special version and has a name. Which name?
 
Next question: As we see this word is generally translated as "world reformation". During the XIXth century, at the end of the "Edo period", a few years before the Meiji Restoration and the modernisation of Japan, a series of disastrous earthquakes occured in Japan. Many Japanese thought that a "Yonaoshi God" named "Namazu" was the responsible. This "god" was depicted as an animal: do you know which one?
 
 
QUESTION (pochettes 4)
Have a look to this single sleeve
 
You're good? Pay attention: you have to find TWO good answers! Ok, now here is the question... This is the sleeve of the single featuring...
 
 
QUESTION (pochettes 5)
Have a look to this single sleeve
 
Good? so... what is the single name?
 
 
QUESTION (pochettes 6)
 
let's have a look to this picture. As you can see, this is a "Babymetalized" sleeve of an album. it is also the occasion to give a special shoutout to futonsrf!
Do you know what is the band who made the original album?
 
Same question, but with this picture
 
Same question, but with this picture
 
Same question, but with this picture
 
 
 
 
KNOWLEDGE OF THE SHOWS
 
 
 
 
QUESTION (knowledge of the shows 1)
In 2014, Babymetal made their debut appearance in the US on July 27 with a headlining show. Do you know where it was?
 
 
QUESTION (knowledge of the shows 2)
In march 2014, two important shows took place at the famous Nippon Budokan arena. There were two parts: Black night and Red night. First question, which one came first: Black Night or Red night?
 
Second question: do you know the official "subname" of these shows?
 
The Black Night featured 2 more songs than the Red Night. Do you know which songs? (You have to find two good answers)
 
The setlist did NOT have the same order. However, only one song was played at the same place, the 13rd. Do you know which song?
 
 
QUESTION (knowledge of the shows 3)
Let's talk about the first time Babymetal was on stage! So let's see if you know something about this event!
Ok first question: What song did they played on stage?
 
This one was definitely super easy. Second question: Kami-band, Babybones or Backtrack?
 
Still very easy. Let's raise the difficulty. Next question: What was the event name?
 
Last question: Attention to details needed here: Where does it takes place?
 
 
QUESTION (knowledge of the shows 4)
In 2014, there were several shows named "Apocrypha". How many of them?
 
Next question: Have a look to this list. Here are featured shows from 2014 to 2016.
you're good? Right... So... How many of them are false?
 
Last question: Let's go back to 2014. During one of this "Apocrypha" shows, Su-metal did something unusual: she appeared on a Black Babymetal song. Do you know which one? Warning... Frogs pit!
 
 
QUESTION (knowledge of the shows 5)
let's have a look to this picture.
So... Do you know from which concert this pic is?
 
Ok, but what is the official name of this show?
 
Here is a pic from an interview. At the end of the interview, the girls are given a mask you can see here, which comes with the "Niwaka senbei"... so do you know what a Senbei is?
 
 
QUESTION (knowledge of the shows 6)
First of all, have a look to this pic. Nice pic right? Here is the question: do you know when it was taken?
 
Good. Next question. In the picture you may have noticed this writing:
Photo: AFA
Do you know what the acronym "AFA" stands for?
 
Ok next one. The year the pic was taken, how many "AFA" Babymetal was involved in?
 
Where did they take place?
 
And final question: this very pic was taken in...
 
 
 
 
CULTURAL QUESTIONS
 
 
 
 
QUESTION (culture 1)
In the famous interview on Nylon, Su-metal is asked how do the girls communicate with the Fox-God. Do you know what she answered?
They communicate with the Fox god...
here is the sequence with the good answer.
 
 
QUESTION (culture 2)
Let's have a Fox-god related question. So...
you all know how to say "Fox" in Japanese right? RIGHT?
 
Ok it wasn't even a question. So let's get more serious. The japanese Kitsune has a whole mythology attached to it. Do you know from where the Japanese kitsune myths are originated?
 
Next question: The oldest recorded Japanese myth including a supernatural kitsune is dated back to the eight or nineth century at least... It is a tale about...
 
Ok, next: The story from the precedent question is known thanks to a set of three books written in the 8th or 9th century. It's full name is a bit long (日本国現報善悪霊異記), but it has a shorter name... Do you know this name?
 
the book from the precedent question is Japan's oldest collection of myths, anecdotes, folktales and legends... this kind of stories have a specific name. Do you know which one?
 
Finally, last but not least: What is the power that is NOT commonly associated to the Fox-God / Japanese kitsune?
 
 
QUESTION (culture 3)
So, as you can see in the "TITLES" section, the highest title you can win is "9 tails kitsune". Kitsune, in Japanese mythology, are said to grow a new tail as they get older. The more a kitsune grows tails, the more powerful it is. So here is the question: do you know how many time does it take to grow a new tail?
 
However, the system establishing progressive stage of power accordingly to the number of tails is not found in the old kitsune tales. Do you know when this idea appeared and then become canonical in the kitsune lore?
 
 
QUESTION (culture 4)
Do you know from which song are these lyrics?
 
it's the period of war. Winners enjoy heaven.
We always lose and our life is hell.
Now we will say farewell to these days.
Now let's stand up!
 
 
The song is likely a reference to a Japanese TV show from the 70's. Which one?
 
And finally here is the nasty question: In the lyrics there is this sentence:
 
it's the period of war. Winners enjoy heaven.
 
In Japanese lyrics the word used for «period of war» is «Sengoku». In fact this word translates as «the warring states» which refers to an actual period of Japan History, but also to a period of Chinese History... Amongst the following possibilities, 2 are actual «Sengoku period», one Chinese and one Japanese. Which ones? [reminder: BC means «Before Christ»; CE means «Common Era» or after Christ]
 
 
Yeah! That's the end of this quizzes! Well done! Here are some nice goodies for you: Album from 2015 and another one
submitted by JawaScrapper to BABYMETAL [link] [comments]


2020.09.11 21:51 ariasamm Here’s the Bee Movie Script in English since the first got removed. Mods can’t stop us.

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? - I'll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? - Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down? Oould you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... That's Barry! ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done enough damage. But isn't he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense." - Get this on the air! - Got it. - Stand by. - We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow! - Hello! Left, right, down, hover. - Hover? - Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. - When will this nightmare end?! - Let it all go. - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. - Thinking bee! - Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that.
submitted by ariasamm to teenagers [link] [comments]


2020.09.10 12:50 Skibz781 Interested So Cal parties: selling/delivering part of my ska collection: 187 CDs, 12 vinyl, 9 videos, misc. shirts and posters. List inside, name yer price.

I didn't see any rules about selling here...actually, I don't see ANY posted rules, which probably explains my inexplicable longevity here.
I've been downsizing a lot of my life: hundreds upon hundreds of books, DVDs and CDs out the door and my ska is no exception. However, I just don't feel comfortable throwing so many classic and popular titles out to Goodwill, so I'm going to offer the entire lot to anyone who wants it, and I'll throw in all sorts of extra crap which is otherwise going straight to the thrift store or the garbage can.
[EDIT: Originally, I just posted this in the hopes that someone would make it easy on me and spontaneously purchase a bin of 200+ random CDs, but I've been fielding - and honoring - so many requests for a specific this and that that I've just decided to settle on that. 3+ items minimum, grab what you can, I guess. These items aren't just priced to move, they're priced to get the hell out of my storage (which is even cheaper!).]
CDs:
Adjustments, The - A Little to the Left
Adjustments, The - Everybody Must Get Cloned
Against All Authority - Destroy What Destroys You
Against All Authority - The Restoration of Chaos & Order
Aggrolites, The - Reggae Hit L.A.
Aitken, Laurel - Live at Club Ska
Aitken, Laurel - The Pama Years
Alcoskalics, The - The Bus Never Comes
Allstonians, The - The Allston Beat
Army of Juan - Army of Juan
Arsenals, The - Stomp
Articles, The - Flip F'real
Baccone Dolce - Barbecued Cats
Bad Manners - Feel Like Jumping: The Greatest Hits Live!
Bad Manners - Greatest Hits Live
Big D & The Kids Table - Good Luck
Big D & The Kids Table - How It Goes
Blue Meanies - Introduce the Post Wave
Bruce Lee Band, The - The B. Lee Band
Bruce Lee Band, The - Beautiful World
Buck-O-Nine - Pass the Dutchie
Buck-O-Nine - Songs in the Key of Bree
Buck-O-Nine - Twenty Eight Teeth Sampler
Busters, The - 150% Live
Busters, The - Make a Move
Can't Say - True Grit
Catch 22 - Alone in a Crowd
Chase Long Beach - A Molotov Coctail Party
Creepers, The - The Rockin' Horror Creep Show
Critical Mass - Give It Up, Let It Go
David Hillyard and the Rocksteady Seven - Playtime
Deal's Gone Bad - The Longest Happy Hour: 1998 - 2003
Debonaires, The - Debonaires
Debonaires, The - Untitled EP
Decepticonz, The - Rot Your Brain
Desorden Publico - The Ska Album
Dion Knibb & The Agitators - Driving Me Mad!
Donkey Punch - 8 Track
Dr. Ring-Ding & the Senior Allstars - Dandimite!
Easy Big Fella - Fruitcup
Fabulous Rudies, The - The Fabulous Rudies
Ferry, Joe - Skallelujah
Flip the Switch - Too Much Ska for One Hand
Flux Skapacitor - Flux Skapacitor
Go-Go Rays, The - Family Fun Night
Goldfinger - Goldfinger
Goldfinger - Hang-Ups
Gray, Owen - Shook, Shimmy & Shake: The Anthology
Green Island - Hit 'em Soft and Slow!
Highball Holiday - Highball Holiday
House of Rhythm - In a Different Style
Hub City Stompers - Blood, Sweat and Beers
Insatiable - Insatiable
Inspecter 7 - Banished to Bogeyland
Inspecter 7 - ...The Infamous
Jeffries Fan Club - Changing the Nation EP
Jeffries Fan Club - JFC Sucks...The Early Years
Jeffries Fan Club - Last Show at The Glass House
Jeffries Fan Club - Live
Jeffries Fan Club - Nothing to Prove
JFK and the Conspirators - The Mayor of Ganja City
Jump With Joey - Ska-Ba
Kemuri - Senka-Senrui
King Chango - King Chango
La Plebe - Conquista 21
Let's Go Bowling - Freeway Lanes
Let's Go Bowling - Stay Tuned
Link 80 - 17 Reasons
Los Hooligans - Traditions
Madness - Total Madness: The Very Best of Madness
McCook, Tommy - The Authentic Ska Sound of...
Mealticket - 13 Apologies
Mealticket - Lisa Marie [no jewel case]
Mephiskapheles - God Bless Satan
Mephiskapheles - Maximum Perversion
Mephiskapheles - Might-ay White-ay
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - 1998 Hometown Throwdown [bootleg]
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - "Hittin' Ya Like a Ton of Bricks" Live 1997 [bootleg]
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - Live from the Middle East
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - Live in Boston, 11/5/1995 [bootleg]
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - Live in Buffalo, 11/30/2000 [bootleg]
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - Live in Rochester, 6/14/2003 [bootleg]
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - Live in Rochester, 9/6/1996
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - Live in Waltham, 10/12/1992 [bootleg]
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - The Mighty Mighty Bosstones/Madcap Split
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - "Modern Rock Live" 3/23/1997 [bootleg]
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - "To the Rescue" Live 1995 [bootleg]
Morgan, Derrick - Moon Hop: Best of the Early Years 1960 - '69
Mr. T-Bone - Mr. T-Bone Sees America
Mustard Plug - Skapocalypse Now! [re-issue]
New York Ska-Jazz Ensemble - New York Ska-Jazz Ensemble
New York Ska-Jazz Ensemble - Skaleidoscope
Ninepoundnote - Go National
O'Sullivan, Buford - The Club of Hopes and Fears
One Eighty - Crackerjack
Operation Ivy - East Bay Singles Collection
Operation Ivy - Operation Ivy
Operation Ivy - Unreleased Energy [bootleg]
Pilfers - "Agua" single
Potshot - Pots And Shots
Potshot - Potshot A-Gogo
Potshot - Rock 'N' Roll [Asian Man]
Potshot - Rock 'N' Roll [TV Freak]
Potshot - 'Til I Die
Pushover - Logic & Loss
Reel Big Fish - "Beer" single
Reel Big Fish - Everything Sucks
Reel Big Fish - Everything Sucks EP
Reel Big Fish - Keep Your Receipt
Reel Big Fish - "The Set Up (You Need This)" single
Regatta 69 - Fat-Free
Regatta 69 - Prime Time
Rotterdam Ska-Jazz Foundation - Sunwalk
Rude Bones - The Down Stair Sessions
Rude Bones - There'll Be Lots of Hard Times Along the Way
Save Ferris - Save Ferris EP
Save Ferris - "The World is New" single
Scofflaws, The - Live, Vol. 1
Scofflaws, The - Record of Convictions
Scofflaws, The - The Scofflaws
Scofflaws, The - Ska In Hi-Fi
Secret Agent 8 - Start. Action. Stop.
Skadaddles, The - Scoop It Up!
Skaladdin - Far-Off From Okay
Skamatiks - The S Files
Skapone - Bold New Flavor
Skarmy of Darkness - How'd We Get So Damn Old?
Skatalites, The - Ball of Fire
Skatalites, The - Bashaka
Skatalites, The - Greetings from Skamania
Skatalites, The - Hi-Bop Ska!
Skatalites, The - Skatalites & Friends at Randy's
Skatalites, The - The Skatalites in Orbit Vol. 1
Skatalites, The - Stretching Out
Skatalites, The & Laurel Aitken - Ska Titans
Skavenjah - Little Monsters
Skavoovie & The Epitones - Fat Footin'
Skinnerbox - Demonstration
Skinnerbox - Special Wild (1989-1994)
Skinnerbox - Tales of the Red
Skoidats, The - A Cure for What Ales You
Skoidats, The - The Times
Skunks, The - Mixed Nuts
Skunks, The - No Apologies
Slapstick - Slapstick
Slow Gherkin + Jeffries Fan Club - Invisible Tank
Smooths, The - Very Own Vegas
Soulutions, The - For Pete's Sake
Specials, The - Guilty 'Til Proved Innocent!
Specials, The - Today's Specials
Staple, Neville - Skanktastic
Steady Earnest - Out of Line
Steady Ups - Soul of the City
Strangeways, The - Corporate Monkey
The Suicide Machines - Destruction By Definition
Telegraph - Quit Your Band
Toasters, The - Live in London
Toasters, The - You're Gonna Pay!
Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra - Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra
Tricia & The Supersonics - King Bravo Selects Ska Authentic
Unsteady - Double or Nothing
Various Artists - The All Skanadian Club Volume II
Various Artists - The All Skanadian Club Volume III
Various Artists - Club Dread: Music from the Original Motion Picture Soundtrack [Toots & the Maytals, Desmond Dekker, etc.]
Various Artists - House of Ska: A Tribute to Madness
Various Artists - Jump Up Records: Caribbean Shakedown
Various Artists - Love And Affection: Ska in the Key of Love
Various Artists - One Step Ahead: Swe-Tone Dance Craze [Swedish comp]
Various Artists - Ska Cover to Cover
Various Artists - Ska Party 1999
Various Artists - Skarmageddon #4: Armageddon Time!
Various Artists - Trojan Rocksteady Box Set
Various Artists - Trojan Rude Boy Box Set
Various Artists - Trojan Ska Rarities Box Set
'Vengers, The - What Happens When I Push This?
Voodoo Glow Skulls - Baile De Los Locos
Voodoo Glow Skulls - The Band Geek Mafia
Voodoo Glow Skulls - Firme
Voodoo Glow Skulls - Steady As She Goes
Voodoo Glow Skulls - Symbolic
Voodoo Glow Skulls - Who Is, This Is?
The W's - Fourth from the Last
Warsaw Poland Bros. - Live
Weaker Youth Ensemble - Weaker Youth Ensemble
Westbound Train - Transitions
Whole Lotta Milka - Got Milka?
Yeska - Skafrocubanjazz

Vinyl:
Bad Manners - Klass (MCA) [okay condition, found at thrift store]
Less Than Jake/Megadeth - "All My Best Friends Are Metalheads"/"The Disintegrators" 7"
Madness - Madness (Geffen)
Madness - One Step Beyond [Sire promotional copy]
Pietasters, The - Oolooloo [Asbestos re-issue on blue vinyl]
Save the Swim Team - Let's Hope for the Best 10"
Save the Swim Team - "Miss Fortune"/"Home Song", "Six Beat Therapy" 7" (Rottentone)
Selecter, The - Too Much Pressure (Chrysalis)
Shilling, The - Haunting the Dancehalls of Hell 7" (High Fidelity)
Slackers, The - "Sarah"/"7 and 7", "Certain Girl" 7" (Asbestos/Underground Communique)
Specials, The - Specials [original UK pressing]
Toasters, The - Recriminations [1988 Moon re-issue]

Video:
Dance Hall Crashers - The Show Must Go Off: Live at the House of Blues L.A. DVD
Fishbone - The Reality of My Surroundings: Past to Present DVD
Less Than Jake - The People's History of Less Than Jake DVD
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - Live in Toronto, Canada, 1/18/1991 DVD [bootleg]
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - Video Stew VHS [w/ buttons]
Moon Ska Records - The Real Ska Reel VHS
Mustard Plug - Never Get Out of the Van: The Story of Mustard Plug DVD
Planet Smashers, The - Ten (1994-2004) DVD
Reel Big Fish - Live! In Concert! DVD

Shirts:
[If they're your size, TAKE THEM]
Dualers, The - Give Me Some Ska... [medium]
Five Iron Frenzy - Five Iron Frenzy Gives Me Gas! [medium] [okay condition]
Jump With Joey - Logo [large] [slightly faded]
Half Past Two - Spot the Difference [large]
Pedal-Tones, The - Boss Reggae [large] [screen print slightly faded]
Ska Parade - Ska Parade logo [extra-large]
Specials, The - 2-Tone Logo [medium, fits like small]

Posters:
Aggrolites, The - generic poster (x2)
Cherry Poppin' Daddies - Ska Punk Riot! 2019 tour mini-poster
International Ska Circus 2006 - festival poster
Jeffries Fan Club - "Last Show at the Glass House" album poster
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - show poster: 12/29/2007 at The Middle East in Cambridge, MA [signed by Dicky Barrett]
Mighty Mighty Bosstones, The - show poster: 12/31/2007 at Lupo's in Providence, RI
Pick It Up! Ska in the '90s - movie poster
Ska Is Dead 3 - tour poster
Slackers, The - "Peculiar" tour poster
Steady Beat Records - 1996 Ska Authentic compilation poster
Toasters, The - "Enemy of the System" album poster

And, if you're the lucky rude boy/rude girl/rudeperson who claims it, take your pick of whatever punk and punk-related CDs are also headed for the second-hand shelves:
Bad Brains - Bad Brains
Big Al's Swing Kids - Swing and Shout
Bowling for Soup - Let's Do It For Johnny!!
Briggs, The - Back to Higher Ground
Briggs, The - Numbers
Broadways, The - Big City...
Business, The - Hardcore Hooligan
Crumbox - Map of the Sky
Descendents - 'Merican
Dickies, The - Live in London
Dickies, The - Still Got Live, Even if You Don't Want It
Distillers, The - Coral Fang
Don Cikuta - Mi Generacion
Happily Ever After - Out with the Old...Swing with the New
Narcoleptic Youth - How to Fake Your Death
NOFX + Rancid - BYO Split Series Volume III
Offspring, The - Conspiracy of One
Rancid - ...And Out Come the Wolves
Rancid - Life Won't Wait
Rancid - Rancid (2000)
Squirrel Nut Zippers - Hot
Squirrel Nut Zippers - Perennial Favorites
Street Dogs - Back to the World
Street Dogs - Fading American Dream
Sum 41 - All Killer No Filler
Toy Dolls, The - On Stage in Stuttgart
Various Artists - A Compilation of Warped Music II [feat. LTJ, VGS, Aquabats, Mustard Plug]
Various Artists - Fueled By Ramen: Feed Your Ears Vol. 1 [feat. The Impossibles, LTJ, Pietasters]
Various Artists - Give 'em the Boot II [feat. Hepcat, Slackers, Pietasters, CV/LOC]e
Various Artists - Punk-O-Rama Vol. 2 [feat. VGS, Rancid]
Various Artists - Tibetan Freedom Concert [feat. Bosstones, Rancid]
Various Artists - Vagrant Records: Five Years on the Streets [feat. The Hippos]
Various Artists - Welcome to Woop Woop: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack [feat. RBF b-side]
Zebrahead - Broadcast to the World
submitted by Skibz781 to Ska [link] [comments]


2020.09.09 22:49 blindguy97 Bee

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better!
submitted by blindguy97 to copypasta [link] [comments]


2020.09.09 07:08 SmolTexas SURVEY RESULTS

+3, +2, +1 balls for the top 3 answers. -3, -2, -1 balls for the bottom 3 answers, unless i don't feel like scoring it that way. it's my survey

reddit name/slack name/real name/SSN

i meant this to mean just put any one of these, not all of them. a few people thought i meant the latter. of those, cory was the only one to seemingly give his actual social security number. +1 bonus ball to cory

Find the dumbest thing on MLBShop.com

bnav:
Cincinnati Reds Nick Castellanos 8-Piece Regulation All Weather Cornhole Bag Set $56.99
the thing about this is that a cornhole set of 8 different players on the team would actually be cool. but instead it's Just Nick Castellanos.
pole:
Women's Oakland Athletics Dooney & Bourke Medium Tote Bag $248
lbon:
Texas Rangers 3' Giant Victory Four Game Set $199.99
both good entries in the category of things that aren't inherently dumb but are absurdly expensive, but outshone by:
dylan:
St. Louis Cardinals Supreme Mystery Grab Bag $249.99
a mystery grab bag for two hundred and fifty u.s. dollars
jiggy:
Miami Marlins Black BlackBerry Curve Cashmere Silicone Case $29.99 Regular, $3.99 Reduced Price Almost Gone!
bgro:
couldnt find anything bad, but i did order this while looking: Men's Baltimore Orioles Fanatics Branded Navy Banner Wave Pullover Hoodie $64.99
congratulations on the hoodie bgro!
Cory:
New York Mets Peanuts Wireless USB Keyboard $54.99
Looks Like Shit
Ruairi:
Houston Astros Highland Mint 2017 World Series Champions 39mm Gold Mint Coin $49.99
pjd:
Houston Astros 2017 World Series Champions Blu-Ray Collector Set $79.99
booooooooooo
des:
St. Louis Cardinals Earth Design Yoga Mat $39.99
i think this looks fine!
iama:
Chicago Cubs Kris Bryant 24" Studds Plush $29.99 or Chicago Cubs Kris Bryant Pro Bros Plush Toy $19.99
the first one is ASTOUNDING and the second one is fine i don't know why you submitted both when the first one is clearly the correct submission
+3 dylan, +2 iama, +1 jiggy -3 pjd and ruairi, -2 bgro, -1 desmond

Give me a Youtube video under a minute long that will make me laugh

Cory:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKM0P9gWx7k
did not make me laugh but good pacing, doesn't wear out its welcome
dylan:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQIrMhUeMVs&ab_channel=LeekdaBeast
this is mesmerizing i have been watching this for ten minutes
lbon:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zBJU9ndpH1Q&ab_channel=ChelDush
solid old video!
pole:
azula describes her fursona https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CITrqyliiUM
i am sorry ben it DID NOT make me laugh
bnav:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vhh_GeBPOhs&ab_channel=MrWueb007
VERY classic but still great!
desmond:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T28LyXf8MlU&ab_channel=SageManeja
THAT is a true classic
bgro*:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-dAVlWnep0&ab_channel=PennyBanks
good contagious laughter
joggg:
over a minute but the actual content is a small portion repeated https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvx_zuTR1Xc
funny but it does still break the rules
pjd: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=prCHL8dJdPA&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=DyomHellas
nice!
ruairi:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UBQP9gEldRk&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=moorent
shortest video submitted and has some punch to it
iama:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oI6uYJrIqaw&ab_channel=9NEWS
nice!
+3 dylan, +2 bgro, +1 des -3 pole, -2 jiggy, -1 Cory

Something nice that has happened to you in the past month

bgro:
I reserved a rental car months in advance and when I showed up, they told me I would need to wait two hours for the car to be ready and I think they were expecting me to be an asshole about it because they were kind of preemptively dickish about it. Instead, I just went home, waited two hours, came back, got my car and then because I had been cool about it, they comped me about $100 for having to wait. The whole reservation only cost $220 so that was pretty cool.
Cory:
Got a real nice performance evaluation from my job. I've been unsure about the job ever since I switched to remote work, just feeling extremely unmotivated and not very efficient, so it was good to hear that it's mostly in my head.
Des:
Didn't exactly happen to me but a student told a coworker that the reason she chose Xavier was because the grounds are so beautiful.
dylan:
owner at nearby greek place we like gave us a free bottle of house wine when we told her we just moved in down the street, pretty cool
Ruairi:
I visited one of my best friends in Texas with our other best friend. First time ever being in a small town like that and it was awesome. Makes me kinda want to live in some small town when I get older as a high school baseball coach with a hot wife.
jiggy:
i moved to a new city and made new friends that's pretty nice
bnav:
got kissed it was pretty hype
pole:
my friend gave me a sirfetch'd just so i didn't have to bother evolving my own
lbon:
i have become very close with one of my friends i met online and i am very excited to end up meeting him
pjd:
My wife and I got a new dog, his name is Bentley and he is a labrador, he's a giant goofball and has made a good friend for our other dog Christmas
iama:
I got my diploma in the mail and it was a nice tangible culmination of what I've actually achieved in the past 3 years of my life, in what was otherwise kind of a stressful month.
+3 to iama, +2 to bgro, +1 to everyone else!

An argument you have had with your parents that you were wrong about in hindsight

pole:
I was convinced that my parents were wrong and I was not depressed. Turns out I was lol.
Cory:
That I didn't need therapy as a teenager. Really wish I would have stuck with it!
therapy: It's Good!
Ruairi:
I dunno never really argued with my parents. gonna have to take the L on this one
des:
I can't think of anything specific :/
:/
bgro:
It's been a long time since I argued with my parents. I would guess it was some time when I was still living at home and I was just being standoffish and unappreciative of the fact that my parents were housing/feeding me. I would barely talk to them and just stay in my room and I dont remember having a specific conversation about it, but eventually I realized that I was the one who needed to change my attitude because really my parents weren't doing anything wrong.
pjd:
That I wouldn't regret spending time with them and the rest of the family. Now that im out on my own i do regret all the times i passed up spending time with them. If i could go back i would have spent as much time with them as possible
relationships with family: It's Good!
jiggy:
i haven't really argued with them about much but my mom did argue against me moving in with my ex (HAD SEX WITH ANOTHER PERSON WHILE IN A 'MONOGAMOUS RELATIONSHIOP' WITH ME) so that seems like a fair one to post
iama:
I really didn't want to eat my vegetables. I probably should have eaten the vegetables.
lbon:
this is most topical for me but kinda boring but i argued with my parents in favor of not contacting a person i barely know who recommended a college counselor to my dad when she recognized him at a movie theater. we ended up contacting the counselor and she has been great.
dylan:
My dad used to get annoyed about how I always overpacked my bookbag in high school and I always blew it off, but now I have back problems that aren't necessarily related to that but it really makes you think
+3 bgro/pjd, +2 pole/cory, +1 lbon -2 ruairi/des, -1 iama

Tenth favorite pokemon

pole:
articuno
Ruairi:
Zapdos
feel like zapdos is the correct answer between the two, sorry pole
dylan:
Vaporeon eeveelutions are a solid tenth favorite pokemon choice. not my favorite eeveelution but not a bad answer
Cory:
Ditto
Des:
Poliwrath
a nice but not fantastic gen one pokemon feels like a good tenth favorite pokemon choice
bgro:
Ambipom
EXTREME tenth favorite pokemon energy. love this choice
bnav:
Gengar
great pick, probably a top 5 favorite for me but right in the range
taylor:
Gengar
too soon
pjd:
Golisopod, good Bug/Water type that i love using competitively i appreciate the competitive aspect, but unfortunately it is also fuck ugly
lbon:
Squirtle
gotta go with Blastoise imo
iama:
Archeops
yeah that's fine
+3 bgro, +2 bnav, +1 Cory -2 jiggy, -1 pjd, -1 pole

Tell me about a piece of media you have enjoyed recently and haven't had the chance to talk enough about

bnavis:
i relistened to clairo's album and holy shit that girl can sing. shit rocks.
Cory:
Lianne La Havas's newest album - definitely my AotY pick for 2020 so far. I just love everything about it.
desmond:
I've been watching a lot of No Reservations and Bourdain just has such an interesting view of the world. He's so self-aware when he goes to poorer countries, and, while he initially comes across as somewhat pompous, he's actually incredibly kind and complimentary of the people who cook for him. I'm really sad that he killed himself and I think about it a lot when I'm watching.
bgro:
Really can't say enough good things about Schitt's Creek. It's hilarious and heartwarming and I think it might even be the best Catherine Keener has ever been in anything. Dan Levy and Annie Murphy somehow make their hilariously entitled characters actually redeemable and you root for their success. It's just a good-hearted show that consistently makes me laugh.
Ruairi:
the 5th season of Lucifer. Nobody I know has watched it so I haven’t been able to talk about it
pjd:
I started reading a series called Lightbringer by Brent Weeks. I just finished reading the first book in the series "The Black Pirsm" and was blown away. Here is the plot summary for the book In a world where magic is tightly controlled, the most powerful man in history must choose between his kingdom and his son in the first book in the epic NYT bestselling Lightbringer series.
Guile is the Prism. He is high priest and emperor, a man whose power, wit, and charm are all that preserves a tenuous peace. Yet Prisms never last, and Guile knows exactly how long he has left to live.
When Guile discovers he has a son, born in a far kingdom after the war that put him in power, he must decide how much he's willing to pay to protect a secret that could tear his world apart.
Ive really been digging it and cant wait to start the second book
pole:
The Gondoliers is an excellent critique of nominal republicanism and nobody wants to discuss it just because it came out 141 years ago
T:
fucking selling sunset man it's sublime i love trash reality tv and discounted it immensely for some reason
iama:
I watched Inferno (https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0080923/?ref_=tt_sims_tt) and even though it has gotten mixed reviews I thought it was really good. I really liked the cinematography and thought it was a worthy sequel. Probably my second favorite movie by the director.
dylan:
I'm addicted to watching a Vancouver-based youtube named Northernlion become aggressively more toxic every time he plays Fall Guys. He was already my favorite and he just doubles down on the ridiculousness. It's fantastic in every way.
lbon:
i have really started getting into ASMR youtube videos, so its not really one specific piece of media but i something about it is great. i recommend DennisASMR, Latte ASMR, and Gibi ASMR for anyone looking to get into it
+3 desmond, +2 pjd, +1 bgro nobody gets a minus for talking about the things they like

Say something nice about the next person in line

Cory to lbon:
Luca is extremely smart and creative, and it is a genuine pleasure to watch him grow as a person.
lbon to iama:
i really like iama's ability to make it to every slack meetup, whether he was invited or not
iama to wharble:
Wharble you're a fun dude to shoot the shit with and I wish you were less busy with work to hang around and talk baseball.
me filling in for wharble to pjd:
you are the only person to really stick around heavily from last sim and the way you seamlessly fit in with the group of slack regulars is really nice
pjd to Ruairi:
Ruairi is a beautiful man. He is dedicated to his job and providing nothing but good content for people who play MLB The Show. He is a wholesome man who never has anything negative to say about anyone else. Ruairi is a good friend to all
Ruairi to des:
His passion for plants is inspiring and beautiful. He’s also a huge cutie.
des to bnav:
He's very smart, and funny, and nice, and I really just want him to be happy, because he deserves it so much. Things are hard for him right now, but he's going to be wildly successful in life.
bnav to jiggy:
jiggy is a strong man who stands up for his morals, he's also incredibly kind.
jiggy to pole:
pole is very passionate about the thing he cares about and is not afraid to vocalize it which is something i like in people.
pole to bgro:
I really appreciate all the work Bgro has put into the various slack games over the past year or so (e.g. slack survivor).
bgro to dylan:
Dylan is intelligent, a good conversationalist, and someone you can rely on to be objective and rational when discussing things. Seems like he is a strongly principled person who acts on his beliefs.
dylan to cory:
What can I say that hundreds of thirsty women (or anyone!) in the Bay Area haven't already said?
-2 to lbon giving a joke answer, -1 to dylan not really answering, +3 to everyone else

What is your Starbucks order

the people who order nothing:
des:
Nothing, I don't like coffee and I'd rather make tea at home.
dylan:
ice water
the people who understand starbucks has other things:
pole:
Hot chocolate, I don't drink coffee.
lbon:
dont drink coffee but if i go to starbucks i get some kind of iced tea, depends on the day
pjd:
Dragonfruit Lemonde, i dont drink a lot of Starbucks because of how pricey it is here
the people who order coffee:
Cory:
Venti mocha, no whip
bgro:
Vanilla latte (dont really drink coffee)
iama:
usually I just get regular coffee but if i feel fancy, then a mocha latte probably
Ruairi:
Chocolatey thingy. A large frap
Keith:
venti iced caramel macchiato with 4 shots of blond and an extra shot of caramel syrup due to being a child
cold brewnavis:
cold brew, black
+3 jiggy, +2 cory, +1 bgro -3 dylan, -2 desmond, -1 pole

How many balls should I get

7 balls: 8 votes 1 ball: 2 votes 15 balls: 1 vote 0 balls: 0 votes
i was not going to award any balls for voting to give me more balls, but since Ruairi was the only person to vote for 15 balls he can have an extra ball

You may give one ball and take one away

the results: desmond +2 bnavis +1 dylan +1 bgro +1 iama +1 bgro +1 wharble (did not participate in survey) +1 lbon 0 jiggy -1 pole -1 pjd -1 ruairi -1 cory -2
anonymous quote: "take one from Cory (just bc i assume he'll get a lot)"

What is your hidden talent

pole:
I can pronounce the name of that really long welsh town, Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysilogogogoch
Glenwood:
i can tie cherry stems in knots with my tongue i guess
lbon:
i can sleep equally as well on both sides of the bed
is this not normal
pjd:
Does being a disappointment count as a talent? Because i am great at that
the only thing disappointing about you is this answer
desmond:
Idk I guess I'm good at memorization?
bnavis:
i can remember really vague and useless trivia for things that are super irrelevant
Ruairi:
I do card tricks. I also have a very good memory. I’m also very good at math in my head. And math in general.
iama:
i can name every country in the world and locate it on a map, as well as name the majority of the capitals, purely from memory
des may have an incredible memory but everyone else had more conviction
Cory:
I'm very good at directing the packing and unloading of vehicles.
the man is a natural leader
bgro:
I can chug beer faster than just about anyone
dylan:
I can guarantee with a reasonable amount of certainty I'm the best Rock Band vocalist you've ever met.
+3 dylan, +2 bgro, +1 iama -3 pjd, -2 lbon, -1 desmond

Strawberry, vanilla, or chocolate?

+1 to all who answered vanilla, 0 to all who answered strawberry, -1 to all who answered chocolate

Make up a guy who sounds like a Giants reliever

Bnavis: Tyler Gordon PJD: Sergio Wilson Ruairi: Brian White iama: Caden Jackson bgro: Scott Osterbrich Cory: Daniel Humphries desmond: Garrett Blaukamp thefuckinwolves: Sam Kennedy lbon: Tariq Byers pole: Seth Skyscraper dylan: Nick Garcia
scored purely on how much they sound like a Giants reliever +3 Ruairi, +2 dylan, +1 iama -3 pole, -2 bgro, -1 lbon

Describe your perfect Sunday morning

iama:
I am awoken early by sunlight streaming through my window. Nonetheless, I feel well rested. I lie in bed for a short while basking in the soft warmth of the sheets and the soft sunlight filling the room. Stretching, I rise. I shuffle into the kitchen, where bacon and eggs are being cooked by my housemate. I help get breakfast ready, and then I eat my breakfast at the table while sipping coffee. After breakfast, I prepare for the day's activities.
desmond: My internal clock actually allows me to sleep past 8:30, I get up and get a breakfast sandwich to bring back home and eat on my porch with some tea. I watch a show or play some video games for a while and take a nap around lunchtime.
Ruairi:
It’s raining/drizzling outside. I wake up next to my hot wife/girlfriend and play some Michael Bublé. Then I put on a fire in our fireplace. Start making breakfast. We’re talking pancakes, french toast, and cinnamon rolls. My hot wife walks into the kitchen wearing a Nick Castellanos jersey and nothing else. Life is good. we eat our breakfast and drink champagne because why waste the good taste of champagne with orange juice. We eat our breakfast and drank our champagne out on our balcony watching the rain
lbon:
sleepign until 10 am, then sitting outside eating yoplait yogurt listening to the birds
bnavis:
i wake up at like 10 am, mom made eggs or some shit, watch a terrible TLC show, probably 4 weddings, for a couple hours.
dylan:
turn on the record player, have a nice breakfast, and have an aggressive amount of sex while i hear the church let out from across the street
bgro: I like to be very active on Saturday and then do literally nothing on Sunday. So...sleep in, shower, play video games all day, watch some sports, watch the latest episode of a good HBO show that evening, go to bed.
Jigsawkane:
sleep until noon, get up at 1 and have a homemade bacon and egg mcmuffin while watching baseball.com
http://www.baseball.com/
pole:
I do not wake up until the afternoon
cory:
Wake up with no alarm, make some coffee, make a delicious brunch, go for a little walk down to the Point.
pjd:
I wake up, sun is shinning, birds are chirping. Christmas is snuggled up to me snoring away like the giant squish she is. A wonderful smell makes its way into my room, its the smell of chocolate chip pancakes. My wife has prepared my favorite breakfast with chocolate milk as a beverage. I blow bubbles into my chocolate milk because i am a child. In this perfect world i have quit my job and no longer have to work Sundays. I go outside, get some fall yardwork done. Leaves raked into a big pile to be given that good suck by the leaf blower. Then 1 PM rolls around. Its football time. My mother and grandmother who are both massive Eagles fans have come to my house to watch the game. The Eagles blow out the Cowboys, Carson Wentz throws for 300+ yards and 5 Touchdowns. My wife prepares my favorite dinner, Chicken Alfredo. We have a nice red wine with dinner as well. Some of our friends join us for dinner as is Sunday tradition and then games afterwards. Many laughs are shared in the home my wife and I have built. Everyone goes home happy and I fall asleep finally content with the life i have built
i am really deep into this however Patrick, dinner and falling asleep for the night are not a part of Sunday Morning
+3 Ruairi, +2 iama, +1 pjd no minuses, your mornings are all very lovely
Two types of cuisine
des: Italian and Mexican bgro: Italian and Mexican dylan: Italian and Mexican pjd: Italian and Mexican Ruairi: Mexican and Greek cory: Mexican and American jiggy: Mexican and Indian lbon: Italian and American pole: Italian and Ashkenazi iama: Italian and Japanese bnav: Italian and Indian
+3 jiggy, +2 cory, +1 bnav -1 to all Italian and Mexican answers for not not being individual enough

Which shell is the ball under?

The ball was under the left shell!
+3 points to iama and dylan, 0 points to everyone else

DONATIONS

total raised: $141.50 cory: $100 +3 balls bnav: $25 + 2 balls lbon: $12.50 +1 ball

FINAL RESULTS

CORY 16 balls IAMA 15 balls BGRO 11 balls DYLAN 9 balls BNAVIS 8 balls JIGGY 8 balls RUAIRI 5 balls PJD 2 balls WHARBLE 1 ball DESMOND 0 balls LBON -1 balls POLE -3 balls
all who finished at 0 or fewer balls will be given one ball for the lottery. wharble did not participate in the survey but will get the first pick if his one ball wins, otherwise will pick last
submitted by SmolTexas to groupselect2k18 [link] [comments]


2020.09.07 22:17 Username-blank Bee movie script

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know I'm gonna guess bees
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2020.09.07 12:05 TumbleWeedFucker Poop fart balls

Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Lad
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2020.09.07 12:04 TumbleWeedFucker The very relevant may-may

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And
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2020.09.06 18:14 NewsPlant Inside the online cult of #JusticeforSSR The story of three men united by their fever-pitch resentment towards Rhea Chakraborty, and their anger and grief at the death of a Bollywood star.

Inside the online cult of #JusticeforSSR The story of three men united by their fever-pitch resentment towards Rhea Chakraborty, and their anger and grief at the death of a Bollywood star.
A picture posted on a popular Facebook group shows actor Rhea Chakraborty next to a coronavirus illustration. “Which virus is more dangerous?” shouts the text on the image. The caption says: “2020 worst year in the history of mankind. The two most dangerous virus against humanity.”
The Facebook group in question is called “Justice for Sushant Singh Rajput”. With over one lakh followers, it’s peppered with posts hashtagged #ArrestRheaChakraborty and #IAmSushant.
And that’s just the tip of the iceberg.
“She should be hanged,” said Singh Dheeraj, one of the group’s five administrators. “But then again, in our country, it took very long for even Afzal Guru or Yakub Memon to be hanged..."
Dheeraj is a final-year engineering student in Faridabad. He agreed to talk to me over a Facebook Messenger call only after he confirmed that I’m a “nationalist”. “I’m against anti-nationalism,” he told me. About being one of the admins of the Facebook group, he said, chuckling: “I have not told my parents or friends. They will think that I am not focusing on my studies.”
For a nation obsessed with Bigg Boss**, viewers no longer need to wait for an episode to be shot and aired. A version of this reality show, well-known for its voyeuristic appeal, plays out all day, every day, on social media and TV news screens. Ever since actor Sushant Singh Rajput died in June, the saga that followed has unfolded on our screens, and the past month has been particularly binge-worthy.**
In a profile by the New York Times in June, talk show host Jon Stewart said, “Twenty-four-hour news networks are built for one thing, and that’s 9/11. There are very few events that would justify being covered 24 hours a day, seven days a week. So in the absence of urgency, they have to create it.”
And this is exactly what’s happened following Rajput’s death. Except this isn’t a movie — Chakraborty cannot take off her make-up and go home at the end of the day. Instead, she’s been thrust into a real-life trial by the media, where everyone watching, from national television anchors to quiet college-going students, has turned jurist.
In the process, Chakraborty has been torn apart by leading TV news channels, which demand her arrest, accuse her of “black magic” , camp out outside her building, pass off conspiracy theories as “news”, and conduct “postmortems” of Rajput himself. Republic’s Arnab Goswami screaming about drugs is only surpassed by Times Now’s Navika Kumar breathlessly running into the studio claiming to have a bag full of incriminating documents.
“It isn’t that Arnab or Navika don’t know what they’re doing,” said Pratik Sinha, founder of fact-checking site Alt News**. “They know exactly what and why they go on camera for. They have people to please.”**
Instead, it’s worth asking why young men and women like Dheeraj, who have never met either Rajput or Chakraborty, suddenly find themselves dedicating hours to administering Facebook groups that seek “justice for Sushant”.
For this, I spoke to three men – Saahil Chaudhary, an aspiring actomodel; Surjeet Singh Rathore, a member of the Karni Sena, a caste Hindu group; and Dheeraj. What links them is their fever-pitch resentment towards Chakraborty, and their anger and grief at the death of a Bollywood star.


https://preview.redd.it/0wvscb7gxjl51.png?width=794&format=png&auto=webp&s=ec670d0cf24a98f5ca4373602479d02fec17fdfa

Humans of #ArrestRheaChakraborty

Over the course of lengthy conversations, I asked all the three men where they found their conviction to convict Rhea Chakraborty.
Singh Dheeraj
Dheeraj hadn’t been a big fan of Rajput; what drew him was the fact that Rajput, like himself, was also from Bihar and managed to make it big in Bollywood.
For Dheeraj, the logic is fairly simple as to why he believes that Rajput was murdered, and did not die by suicide.
“How can they suddenly call him crazy now?” he said, possibly referring to reports on Rajput’s mental health. “It must have something to do with the fact that Rhea was living with him, right?”
This is a popular theory. Rajput’s therapist broke confidentiality last month and said the actor had depression and bipolar disorder. While the therapist also said Chakraborty was his “strongest support”, Rajput’s family has claimed that he “started having mental problems” after Chakraborty “came into his life”.
When I asked Dheeraj what kind of changes he thinks Chakraborty brought into Rajput’s life, he paused and came up with this anecdote, which he said is tied to the idea of an “ideal home”.
“Agar Salman [Khan] ki girlfriend ya wife aur Salman ke beech scene hua, toh kiska chalega? Salman ka hi chalega. Aur jabki yahan par Sushant aur Rhea ke sath jo scene hua, usme kiska chala tha? Rhea ka chala tha,” he said. (If something happens between Salman Khan and his girlfriend or wife, who will win? Salman will. And here, if something happened between Sushant and Rhea, who used to win? Rhea used to.)
But why did he think Chakraborty was controlling Rajput? Dheeraj brought up how Chakraborty tried to “change” Rajput’s staff members and friends.
“She had things to hide...look how she was acting with Mahesh Bhatt,” he said. “Was it correct of her to behave that way when she was with Sushant? Anyway, I am a nationalist, I am anti-Bollywood, anti-Rhea and anti-all these drugs and alcohol she used to do.” He refused to elaborate further.
This feeds into the image of Chakraborty constructed by the mainstream media. Photos of her posing on a beach in swimwear, or videos of her working out in sportswear are repeatedly shown during panel discussions, suggesting to viewers, like Dheeraj, that she’s some sort of promiscuous, gold-digging seductress with no “morality” or “culture”.
After some hesitation, he admitted that he believes Chakraborty deserves capital punishment, though he was quick to add: “Justice should be achieved but not hanging. Anyway in our country it was already difficult to hang people like Yakub Memon or Afzal Guru so obviously she cannot be hanged...but she should be punished...Women are like goddesses for me.”
Dheeraj didn’t watch Dil Bechara**, the movie starring Rajput that released after the latter’s death, because he was juggling between his studies and the Facebook group. He also spends a large part of his day “counselling” women, he said. “Him [Rajput] going away has caused a lot of sadness to many girls,” he explained. “I send them videos...I try to make them understand.”**
Saahil Chaudhary
Not far from Dheeraj, in the same state of Haryana, Saahil Chaudhary took to his YouTube channel on August 27, minutes after Chakraborty gave her first television interview to Rajdeep Sardesai on Aaj Tak.
Wearing a fitted white t-shirt and a neatly shaped beard, Chaudhary folded his hands and addressed his two lakh followers: “Somebody please hammer Rajdeep Sardesai’s head.” He spewed expletives against Chakraborty — zaleel aurath, haram ki bachhi and madarchodd ki bachhi being some of them — while his followers echoed his views gleefully in the comments section below, calling Chakraborty a “prostitute” and a “lady Dawood”.
This video received over 2.85 lakh views on YouTube.
Chaudhary has been busy for the last few months, providing daily updates on the investigation into Rajput’s death. He posted his first video on June 17, two days after Rajput died, telling his viewers that it was his “duty” to “expose the dirty secrets of Bollywood”.
In the video, Chaudhary claimed to have met Rajput “four or five times”. “He was such a gentleman, so kind-hearted. Today, I’m not going to spare anyone.” Since then, Chaudhary has uploaded 48 similar videos. According to him, Chakraborty must be arrested at once and the powerful in Bollywood should be shamed.
Importantly, when I spoke to Chaudhary, he denied having ever met the actor. During our conversation, his own frustrations at not being able to “make it big” in Bollywood were evident. “Out of lakhs of people, one got a chance and he became a star, but then you killed him?” he said. “What the fuck? You murdered him?”
Chaudhary runs a gym in Haryana, and has been trying to make it as an actor and model for over 10 years. Unable to be cast even as the friend of the hero, he started to explore YouTube to make himself more visible, he said. From cooking videos to workout videos to health tips and now the Rajput case, he feels like he’s finally found a platform to gain some stardom.
Although, he added, none of his videos on YouTube are monetised. Chaudhary has over two lakh subscribers on his channel. His most-watched video, with over two million views, is regarding who Chakraborty is dating.
When I asked him for the source of his information to declare Chakraborty guilty, Chaudhary said that people sent him articles and photos that he “verifies using logic”. After this “verification”, he concluded: “Rhea is hiding facts and is involved in the murder.” During the course of our chat, he also claimed that Chakraborty is a “gold-digger” who was having an affair with director Mahesh Bhatt.
So, what would he tell Chakraborty if he ever met her? “I don’t want to talk to her,” he replied. “I will simply do what the entire public wants to do: uske kaan ke neeche bajaunga main. I will give her a tight slap. I am sure that when this happens, the public will be satisfied. With this one slap, Sushant Singh’s parents and sisters will be at peace.”
Surjeet Singh Rathore
YouTube is Chaudhary’s platform of choice, but Surjeet Singh Rathore came into the limelight when he appeared on Arnab Goswami’s primetime show on Republic Bharat on August 21.
The show was hashtagged #WhySorryRhea, and Rathore was introduced as an “eyewitness” who was reportedly present when Chakraborty saw Rajput’s body at the Cooper Hospital mortuary. According to Rathore, Chakraborty “confessed” to her crime then; she placed her hand on her chest and said, “Sorry, babu.”
“Why is she saying sorry? Was she involved?” Rathore asked Goswami, who took long, dramatic pauses and repeatedly asked Rathore to describe Chakraborty’s demeanour.
Rathore is a member of the Karni Sena, a Rajput group. When I spoke to him on the telephone, he said he was in Rajasthan, the Karni Sena’s home state, from where he would “speak the truth”. After appearing on Republic, he claimed, Mumbai became “unsafe” for him. “I am not scared,” he added. “If something happens to me or Kangana Ranaut, Karni Sena poori Hindustan mein aag lagaenge. The Karni Sena will set fire to the whole of India.”
What does that mean? He replied, “Don’t you remember our Padmavat movement?”
Here’s a quick refresher: In 2017, the Karni Sena led a violent campaign against Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s movie Padmavat, claiming it tarnished the reputation of Rajputs and misappropriated history. Before the movie was released, Karni Sena workers vandalised the film set, slapped the director, trashed a theatre playing the movie’s trailer, threatened to cut off actor Deepika Padukone’s nose and behead Padukone and Bhansali, moved petitions to ban the film, and received support from the Bharatiya Janata Party.
The group eventually retreated when Padmavat was released, saying there was, after all, “nothing objectionable” in the film.
Rathore told me he had once spoken to Sushant Singh Rajput on the phone when the Padmavat incident occurred, to tell Rajput not to support Bhansali. Apart from that, they’ve never met, though he met Chakraborty once, according to him, at the mortuary. As he explained to Goswami, he apparently went to the mortuary to see Sushant as a fellow Rajput.
Why is Rathore so involved in this case?
“I am a Rajput. I am a member of the Karni Sena. Sushant was also a Rajput, it’s my right to be involved,” Rathore replied.

https://preview.redd.it/wm3qahsmxjl51.png?width=1000&format=png&auto=webp&s=903f5fd4d47e5f1181c3b15c834f0b47adc92bdd
When he left the mortuary, he said, Aaj Tak spoke to him but the interview never aired. So, Rathore approached Arnab Goswami who helped him “bring the news to the world”. Rathore added that Chakraborty must be arrested “as soon as possible” on the basis of her saying “Sorry, babu” to Rajput’s body.
In his post-Republic days, Rathore spends his time answering “calls from all across the country, mostly from my supporters and from TV channels”. He has a girlfriend but he quickly said, “Woh Rhea jaisi nahi hai.” She is not like Rhea.
Currently, Rathore’s Facebook page, which has over 21,000 followers, is filled with posts seeking justice for Rajput, Rathore’s TV interviews, and pictures from his time in Jaipur. One photo shows him standing on a terrace, arms extended, with the caption: “For success in life...you need two things...Ignorance and confidence...❤️ My Jaipur.”

Politics to the Right

Through the course of my conversations with these men, it became apparent that what irritated them the most was Chakraboty’s alleged infidelity. As men, they seemed to empathise with the pain Rajput might have gone through of loving a “morally corrupt woman”.
Apart from that, the other common thread was their tendency to be aligned with the Right. However, only Dheeraj openly proclaimed his support for the BJP; both Rathore and Chaudhary said this issue isn’t political.
Dheeraj’s affinity towards the Right came forward in our conversation when he asked me if I had worked as a reporter during the citizenship law protests, and what I felt about BJP leader Kapil Mishra’s role. Mishra had made an incendiary speech in February targeting the protesters against the Citizenship Amendment Act, and the Delhi riots followed soon after, leaving over 50 dead.
When I told him that no matter what side I’m on, violence is not the way out, he said, “Violence for religion is justifiable. There are Muslims living in my lane. Tomorrow if they block the road, there is a limit to how long one can wait for the police before taking action himself.”
He also brought up Asifa Bhano, the eight-year-old who was raped and murdered in Jammu in 2018. “Why is that when Asifa, that Muslim child, was raped in a temple in Jammu, all Bollywood celebrities came out and shamed the country?” he said. “What about Hindu women? I am not saying they should not speak about the injustice against Asifa, I’m just saying you cannot internationally shame your country. These celebrities, they are not with us Hindus. They are not with the country.”
Dheeraj, Chaudhary and Rathore all agreed that the only journalists currently doing his job correctly is Arnab Goswami. Dheeraj added that he’s a fan of Zee News’ Sudhir Chaudhary and Aaj Tak’s Anjana Om Kashyap — both of whom are also known for their proclivity towards the BJP.

https://preview.redd.it/atux7ol1yjl51.png?width=1276&format=png&auto=webp&s=6207172eea37a1804d543f2bc220b38dcd21ed47

Lack of moderation of hate content

After these chats, I went through 15 Facebook pages dedicated to fighting for “justice” for Rajput, which has now become synonymous with arresting Chakraborty. These pages are managed by 35 admins in total, of which 20 seemed to have authentic profiles on Facebook, three were clearly fake, three were aliases, and nine I couldn’t tell.
I identified fake profiles based on the fact that they had no personal or authentic pictures. The profile images were either pictures of Rajput or representational images, the friends list was limited, and there was no personal information like place of work.
There was no consistent pattern to be established between the profiles, apart from their support for Rajput, love for Goswami, and hate towards Chakraborty. Some had a history of hateful, communal posts, or far-Right posts, some had posts critical of the government, and others had almost no political posts at all.
Here’s a sample of the sort of hate spewed against Chakraborty.

https://preview.redd.it/00bszhxvxjl51.png?width=1276&format=png&auto=webp&s=45dd3360f3a054ab86167b592817027ec78c7bed
In the background of this venom is the fact that Facebook India has been facing tough questions in recent weeks over its propensity to ignore hate speech. A Wall Street Journal piece reported on Facebook’s soft approach to posts inciting violence by members of the BJP, although the social media giant has robust policies for the same — on paper, at least.
It doesn’t take much to notice that most of the pages I surveyed violate multiple regulations and standards set by Facebook, especially with regards to hate speech, bullying and harassment , and violence and incitement. Nevertheless, most of them have been online for over six weeks, and continue to garner a massive following and rapid engagement.

The news and us

So, let’s return to this question: What does the Sushant Singh Rajput case reveal about us?
It’s a vile but immensely sustainable, and successful, ecosystem, and I reached out to Alt News’ Pratik Sinha to learn more. Alt News has largely kept away from reporting on the news coverage of Rajput’s death.
As Sinha said: “I can bust facts, not gossip.”
News has now entered the realm of gossip, Sinha said, which is rooted in “mudslinging and rumour-mongering”. “Gossip is addictive. I don’t know what to bust in this bizarre case...Initially it looked like this incident was used as a campaign strategy for the upcoming Bihar election, but right now? It has somehow gained a life of its own. Where should one draw the line between freedom of speech and freedom of life?”
Sinha described the viral nature of this “news” as “coordinated inauthentic behaviour”.
A coordinate effort at hate often has two motives, financial or political. In the circus surrounding Rajput’s death, it’s impossible to pinpoint either with clarity. For the many young people involved, Sinha said, being able to earn instant recognition is motive enough.
“For example, maybe for this boy Dheeraj, if not for this case he might not have had women coming up and talking to him,” he said. “Now this may seem frivolous but for him, this must be life-changing.”
What forms a narrative, Sinha explained, is the size of the body that sustains it. Leading channels like Republic and Zee News serve up content that is religiously shared by these Facebook pages. So, who is the trigger: the public, or the news? Has social media ensured that if there’s enough public outrage, news organisations will have to take notice? Or do news channels, in their race for TRPs, produce content tailormade to appeal to the nation’s imagination?
It’s a chicken-and-egg situation, so it’s impossible to accurately answer.
For those without financial or political ambitions, this case seems to have given them a sense of purpose, or “social currency”, as Sinha called it. Dheeraj told me that apart from support, he also receives threats from Shahrukh Khan or Aamir Khan fans. Does that scare him? He immediately and excitedly replied, “No, no, not at all. Maybe it will be good if something big happens with me.”
When it comes to news channels, no matter what came first, media houses ensured that the story stayed alive. In the last month alone, there were four child rapes in New Delhi and a rise in caste- and gender-based violence in Uttar Pradesh. The economy is down, the unemployment rate is up, floods and monsoons have displaced thousands, and the ongoing pandemic claims hundreds of lives every day.
Yet all of this takes a backseat when compared to the Rajput case. Has the case become a distraction from the very real social and cultural fears that we face? As Orwell once said, “Unpopular ideas can be silenced, and inconvenient facts kept dark, without the need for any official ban.”
On Facebook allowing such content to thrive, Sinha said: “Content moderation is most often a business decision. If you take down a post or page that has over one lakh followers, then it means you lose that many eyeballs, which then means you lose that many people looking at advertisements. And that’s where the money flows in for these platforms. So most often, these policies are only written down, not implemented.”
In the last decade, two media trials stand out: the Aarushi murder case and the death of Sunanda Pushkar. Neither found a satisfying judicial conclusion. Trials by the media don’t happen impulsively, Sinha pointed out. “Every day, we scratch our heads as to what is happening today. But it isn’t like we were fine yesterday or the day before, right?” he said.
And ultimately, no matter the outcome of the investigation into Sushant Singh Rajput’s death, the biggest reveal by the media is what this case has exposed when it comes to our society.
Arnav Binaykia, Anna Priyadarshini and Monica Dhanraj contributed research to this article.
https://www.newslaundry.com/inside-the-online-cult-of-justice-for-SSR
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2020.09.05 23:24 00Mitchell00 The Story of My Coke head Father

Hey don’t really know how to post things on this subreddit just really needed a place to vent about my father. I know it’s probably not as bad as many other situations on here. Although both of my parents are absolutely garbage this one will focus on my father because of current events my mother is a whole other catastrophe but here goes nothing. I’ll take you all the way back. Here is a little background on my dad his parents are old immigrants from the Mediterranean area moved to the United States I believe in the early 70’s very old values where all they care about is school, work nothing else. They don’t show very much emotion. He is the male so they always focused a lot on him. Compared to my aunt, while growing up he was never aloud to have friends over, or girls. He went to a Catholic all boys school with abusive teachers of course. Most of this information is from stuff he told me long ago. I’m just putting the pieces together. I know one of his best friends died when he was 17, and it effected him pretty deeply. He met my mom, pretty sure he was a petty dealer a bark but no bite type of guy. He never really took initiate in his life he was smart, and did well in school dropped all of it unsure as to why. Has mainly stuck to construction maybe because off the books meant that he could still do all the drugs he wanted. My mom remembers him being very separate from his parents always playing poor, and milking them for all they are worth. Multiple houses, and cars. Anyways fast forward growing up my dad was my role model my best friend. I looked up to him so much. My child hood wasn’t too bad I guess pretty sure he was always stoned so he slept a lot told me false promises would eventually get worse. “We’ll do so, and so tomorrow or the weekend.” It would come, and he’d say the same thing. It’s fine I didn’t care. Every summer he’d go back to New York for work that summer he stayed, an extra few months in New York. My mom was suspicious, and found some ones number in the garage (the garage is where he’s spend all of his time smoking cigs, or doing whatever else he’d do. Anyways she tore apart the whole garage, and found a bunch of coke paraphernalia. She found out he’d also been cheating. We depended on his money he’d make since my mom was stay at home, and never worked. So some of the bills wouldn’t get paid on time. We where broker than broke. He didn’t care at all I went months with out talking to him. I’m fuzzy on the details but he came back at one point. The house was in my grandparents name but they eventually kicked us out, so I had to move schools, and got really depressed. He stayed in New York for around 2 or so years, if I remember correctly. He came back for holidays after those two years, and for some reason I still didn’t care that he had left I was still happy to see my “role model” I wish I showed my anger he never apologized for a bit of it. My mom showed my grandparents the drugs, and I don’t think they believed it they just think she is crazy which don’t get me wrong she definitely is. He would do house work for them, and they feared he would leave so they enticed him with cars, and houses. “Which he said he earned” I definitely believe the only reason he stayed was for those items. He would go on vacations back to New York, and they wouldn’t think he was coming back. They bought him a house 3 rooms for me, and my siblings I lived with my mom my sister moved in with him, I couldn’t move in yet since situations with my mom where awful too, and I just wanted to go back to my old school. They bought him a car. Also they would never help me and my sibling rather him which I find strange. Anyways he didn’t like the house anymore so he sold it (he flipped it but) he got a house with two bedrooms so that left nowhere for me. Anyways fast forward I’d still see him every once in a while on Sunday he would only ever talk about himself his house, his new tv, him, him, him. I liked hanging out with him it was refreshing from my mom. Things got really bad with my mom, and he promised he would build me a room by December he never did it. I told him how bad the situation was, and nothing would be done about it. He promised me for Christmas, then for my birthday then for new years.. so on and so on for graduation still wasn’t built. He is a contractor so he does this for a living it would take him no time at all. I confronted him about it how it seems like he doesn’t want me living with him he’d always deny and make new false promises just like when I was a kid he’d borrow my holiday money and blow it on drugs, and take him months to pay me back. False promises up the ass. The room finally gets built almost a year later within this time he got a new girl friend, and stopped even bothering to text or talk to me I could have died, and never heard from him no care in the world I at least used to talk to him nothing for months. I sent him a text confronting him it was quite long all I got back was “sorry you feel that way buddy.” I’ll get the room done soon. It wasn’t the room btw is like one third of the garage a rectangle room which had no ac btw. We live in florida, and it is needed to survive anyways it is so shittily done, it’s almost embarrassing a gray rectangle with holes and mismatched tiles, random shit he found the insulation is literally random pieces thrown on the back not fully covered at all. The space he kept for his hoarding junk in the rest of the garage is so much bigger. The ceiling fan broken. Honestly don’t know why I moved in not sure what is better living with my crazy mom or him. I told him I need air conditioning so he sawed a hole from my room to the bathroom right next to each other the hold is tiny as fuck, and has no ventilation my only window is the tiny side door garage that is made out of old glass which I can’t use either or mosquitos. I don’t even have tiles under my bed. My room the lowest it will get is 84 degrees Fahrenheit, and the highest is 93 degrees. I am only alive because of my fans. He refuses to lower the AC so he’s not uncomfortable in “HIS house” he makes it clear to follow his rules for his house. It’s set to 78 degrees all the time but my room will be that, and much more humid even if my door is open. He says opening the door is a solution. He still barely talks to me like I care but at this point I pretty much hate him. He treats me sibling like shit too takes everything out on them. Treats his gf like an angel only talks to her and does drugs outside with my cousin. Can’t believe the room that took “so long” to build was so awfully done with scraps even though he took money from my grandparents for graduation to build it what a joke. As I look back now as a kid he never did anything with me or taught me a single thing he has always been a lazy ass hole who pretends he doesn’t have children. Living through his multiple mid life crisis. If I disappeared would he care no I thought of revenge in the future by never talking to him again. Yet I don’t think he would care at all. I have no parent figure to look up to or ask advice. I know I have to move out I am so miserable, and tired from this heat. I want comfort I live in an area with not so great jobs, and expensive places to live so I’d need a roommate yet nobody else is ready to move out yet. My grandparents still treat him like he’s never done anything wrong they help him out but not their grand children I don’t get it when ever I’d see them they’d mostly speak to each other in a different language he’s kept us so removed from that part of the family, and they don’t care anyways. Anyways thanks for listening if you read through, helps to vent and get it all out in one place even though it’s all over the place. Would appreciate, and advice or words at all
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I have a summary for you. It’s the first rose ceremony of the movie and the drama is already ratcheted up! Two very different men – Blake and Dylan – have their hearts set on handing their rose to Hamerican pie presents girls' rulesh G., but who will offer it to her and will she accept?

All About The movies

american pie presents girls' rules takes place four years american pie presents girls' rules Train to Bamerican pie presents girls' rulesan as the characters fight to escape the land that is in ruins due to an unprecedented disaster.

Public Group

Watch american pie presents girls' rules Full Movie

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HD WATCH ONLINE american pie presents girls' rules FULL MOVIE 123MOVIES FREE STREAMING FILM COMPLETE

Strengthens Cramerican pie presents girls' rulesaders and mountan Moorish commanders rebelled against the British crown.

How long have you fallen asleep during american pie presents girls' rules Movie? The mamerican pie presents girls' rulesic, the story, and the message are phenomenal in american pie presents girls' rules. I have never been able to see another Movie five times like I did this. Come back and look for the second time and pay attention.

Watch american pie presents girls' rules WEB-DL movies This is losing less lame files from streaming american pie presents girls' rules, like Netflix, Amazon Video.

Hulu, Crunchy roll, DiscoveryGO, BBC iPlayer, etc. These are also movies or TV shows that are downloaded through online distribution sites, such as iTunes.

The quality is quite good becaamerican pie presents girls' rulese it is not re-encoded. Video streams (H.264 or H.265) and audio (AC3 / american pie presents girls' rules) are american pie presents girls' rulesually extracted from iTunes or Amazon Video and then reinstalled into the MKV container without sacrificing quality. Download Euphoria Movie Season 1 Movie 6 One of the streaming movies.

Watch american pie presents girls' rules Miles Morales conjures his life between being a middle school student and becoming american pie presents girls' rules.

However, when Wilson “Kingpin” Fiskamerican pie presents girls' ruleses as a super collider, another Captive State from another dimension, Peter Parker, accidentally ended up in the Miles dimension.

When Peter trained the Miles to get better, Spider-Man, they soon joined four otherAamerican pie presents girls' rules from across the “Spider-Verse”. Becaamerican pie presents girls' rulese all these conflicting dimensions begin to destroy Brooklyn, Miles mamerican pie presents girls' rulest help others stop Fisk and return everyone to their own dimensions.

the indamerican pie presents girls' rulestry’s biggest impact is on the DVD indamerican pie presents girls' rulestry, which effectively met its destruction by mass popularizing online content. The emergence of streaming media has caamerican pie presents girls' rulesed the fall of many DVD rental companies such as Blockbamerican pie presents girls' rulester. In July 2020, an article from the New York Times published an article about Netflix DVD, No Manches Frida 2s. It was stated that Netflix was continuing their DVD No. No Frida 2s with 5.3 million camerican pie presents girls' rulestomers, which was a significant decrease from the previoamerican pie presents girls' rules year. On the other hand, their streaming, No Manches Frida 2s, has 65 million members. In a March 2020 study that assessed “The Impact of movies of Streaming on Traditional DVD Movie Rentals” it was found that respondents did not buy DVD movies nearly as much, if ever, becaamerican pie presents girls' rulese streaming had taken over the market.

So we get more space adventures, more original story material and more about what will make this 21st MCU movie different from the previoamerican pie presents girls' rules 20 MCU films.

Watch american pie presents girls' rules, viewers don’t consider the quality of movies to differ significantly between DVDs and online streaming. Problems that according to respondents need to be improved by streaming movies including fast foramerican pie presents girls' rulesding or rewinding functions, and search functions. This article highlights that streaming quality movies as an indamerican pie presents girls' rulestry will only increase in time, becaamerican pie presents girls' rulese advertising revenues continue to soar on an annual basis across indamerican pie presents girls' rulestries, providing incentives for the production of quality content.

He is someone we don’t see happening. Still, Brie Larson’s resume is impressive. The actress has been playing on TV and film sets since she was 11 years old. One of those confamerican pie presents girls' rulesed with Swedish player Alicia Vikander (Tomb Raider) won an Oscar in 2020. She was the first Marvel movie star with a female leader. . And soon, he will play a CIA agent in a movies commissioned by Apple for his future platform. The movies he produced together.

Unknown to the general public in 2016, this “neighbor girl” won an Academy Aamerican pie presents girls' rulesd for best actress for her poignant appearance in the “Room”, the true story of a woman who was exiled with her child by predators. He had overtaken Cate Blanchett and Jennifer Lawrence, both of them hadAamerican pie presents girls' rules out of statues, but also Charlotte Rampling and Saoirse Ronan.

Watch american pie presents girls' rules Movie Online Blu-rayor Bluray rips directly from Blu-ray discs to 1080p or 720p Torrent Full Movie (depending on source), and american pie presents girls' ruleses the x264 codec. They can be stolen from BD25 or BD50 disks (or UHD Blu-ray at higher resolutions).

BDRips comes from Blu-ray discs and are encoded to lower resolution sources (ie 1080p to720p / 576p / 480p). BRRip is a video that has been encoded at HD resolution (american pie presents girls' rulesually 1080p) which is then transcribed to SD resolution. Watch american pie presents girls' rules The BD / BRRip Movie in DVDRip resolution looks better, however, becaamerican pie presents girls' rulese the encoding is from a higher quality source.

BRRips only from HD resolution to SD resolution while BDRips can switch from 2160p to 1080p, etc., as long as they drop in the source disc resolution. Watch american pie presents girls' rules Movie Full BDRip is not transcode and can move down for encryption, but BRRip can only go down to SD resolution becaamerican pie presents girls' rulese they are transcribed.

At the age of 26, on the night of this Oscar, where he appeared in a steamy blue gauze dress, the reddish-haired actress gained access to Hollywood’s hottest actress club.

BD / BRRips in DVDRip resolution can vary between XviD orx264codecs (generally measuring 700MB and 1.5GB and the size of DVD5 or DVD9: 4.5GB or 8.4GB) which is larger, the size fluctuates depending on the length and quality of release, but increasingly the higher the size, the more likely they are to american pie presents girls' rulese the x264 codec.

With its classic and secret beauty, this Californian from Sacramento has won the Summit. He was seen on “21 Jump Street” with Channing Tatum, and “Crazy Amy” by Judd Apatow. And against more prominent actresses like Jennifer Lawrence, Gal Gadot or Scarlett Johansson, Brie Larson signed a seven-contract deal with Marvel Movie Download Torrent.

There is nothing like that with Watch The Curse of La Llorona Free Online, which is signed mainly by women. And it feels. When he’s not in a combination of full-featured superheroes, Carol DanversAamerican pie presents girls' ruless Nirvana as greedy anti-erotic as possible and proves to be very independent. This is even the key to his strength: if the super hero is so unique, we are told, it is thanks to his ability since childhood, despite being ridiculed masculine, to stand alone. Too bad it’s not enough to make a film that stands up completely … Errors in scenarios and realization are complicated and impossible to be inspired.

There is no sequence of actions that are truly shocking and actress Brie Larson failed to make her character charming. Spending his time displaying scorn and ridicule, his courageoamerican pie presents girls' rules attitude continually weakens empathy and prevents the audience from shuddering at the danger and changes facing the hero. Too bad, becaamerican pie presents girls' rulese the tape offers very good things to the person including the red cat and young Nick Fury and both eyes (the film took place in the 1990s). In this case, if Samuel Jackson’s rejuvenation by digital technology is impressive, the illamerican pie presents girls' rulesion is only for his face. Once the actor moves or starts the sequence of actions, the stiffness of his movements is clear and reminds of his true age. Details but it shows that digital is fortunately still at a limit. As for Goose, the cat, we will not say more about his role not to “express”.

Already the 21st film for stable Marvel Cinema was launched 10 years ago, and while waiting for the sequel to The 100 Season 6 MovieAamerican pie presents girls' rules infinity (The 100 Season 6 Movie, released April 24 home), this new work is a suitable drink but struggles to hold back for the body and to be really refreshing. Let’s hope that following the adventures of the strongest heroes, Marvel managed to increase levels and prove better.

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In many ways,Aamerican pie presents girls' rules is the horror movie I've been restlessly waiting to see for so many years. Despite my avid fandom for the genre, I really feel that modern horror has lost its grasp on how to make a film that's truly unsettling in the way the great classic horror films are. A modern wide-release horror film is often nothing more than a conveyor belt of jump scares stamerican pie presents girls' rulesg together with a derivative story which exists purely as a vehicle to deliver those jump scares. They're more carnival rides than they are films, and audiences have been conditioned to view and judge them through that lens. The modern horror fan goes to their local theater and parts with their money on the expectation that their selected horror film will deliver the goods, so to speak: startle them a sufficient number of times (scaling appropriately with the film'sAamerican pie presents girls' rulestime, of course) and give them the money shots (blood, gore, graphic murders, well-lit and up-close views of the applicable CGI monster etc.) If a horror movie fails to deliver those goods, it's scoffed at and falls into the worst film I've ever seen category. I put that in quotes becaamerican pie presents girls' rulese a disgamerican pie presents girls' rulestled filmgoer behind me broadcasted those exact words across the theater as the credits for this film rolled. He really wanted american pie presents girls' rules to know his thoughts.

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2020.09.05 00:50 ALiddleBiddle Here’s Where Jeffrey Epstein Donated Right Before His Arrest

Here’s Where Jeffrey Epstein Donated Right Before His Arrest
Kate Briquelet Senior Reporter
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In the year before his arrest for trafficking minors, Jeffrey Epstein used his shadowy foundation to lavish $891,440 across a dozen nonprofits—including one group in France that was created shortly before Epstein’s contribution.
Epstein’s Gratitude America Ltd. donated tens of thousands throughout 2018 to the obscure group in Paris, along with a Lithuanian ballet company, and an Italian psychology group that offers psychotherapy and sexual counseling.
The French group, whose name translates to “Association for the Promotion of National Cultural Policy Conducted in the 80s and 90s of the Twentieth Century,” launched in July 2018 with $57,897 from Epstein, public records reveal. The organization lists an address in the 14th arrondissement, in a building mostly occupied by doctors’ offices. But the Association wasn’t listed among the building’s buzzers and mailboxes, and it doesn’t appear to have any online presence or known ownership.
Epstein frequently visited Paris, where he owned an $8.6-million apartment steps from the Arc de Triomphe. Indeed, police handcuffed the sex offender on a New Jersey tarmac, just after he returned from France in July 2019.
Several of Epstein’s victims claimed the financier abused them in Paris, according to lawsuits filed against his estate. One survivor, Teala Davies, said Epstein flew her from Madrid to Paris, where he crept into her room and raped her in 2003. Another woman, identified as Mary Doe, claimed Epstein invited her to his Parisian home and “arranged for her to attend a concert accompanied by a world-famous supermodel.”
Virginia Giuffre, who says Epstein kept her as his sex slave, claimed Epstein and his alleged accomplice, British socialite Ghislaine Maxwell, abused her in France, too. (Maxwell, who is awaiting trial in a federal prison on charges related to Epstein’s teen sex trafficking ring, denies Giuffre’s accusations.)
Giuffre has also accused Maxwell of ordering her to have sex with the owner of a large hotel chain during one trip to France, according to a cache of recently unsealed court records. The encounter occurred around the time of Naomi Campbell’s birthday party, Giuffre claimed.
In a deposition, Giuffre said she had sexual contact with Maxwell in a fancy hotel overlooking the Champs-Elysées, and that Maxwell “brought in a redheaded French girl” after approaching her in Paris. Maxwell was allegedly trying to teach Giuffre to recruit victims.
“She walked up to this French girl to show me how easy it was for her to procure girls,” Giuffre testified. “I wasn’t very good at it. And, you know, it was part of my training... to bring in other girls. So she walked up to her. Within five minutes she had her number and that girl came over later that night to the hotel and serviced Jeffrey.”
Epstein’s Paris apartment didn’t just house victims; he invited former friends, including disgraced producer Harvey Weinstein, to visit. While in Paris, Weinstein reportedly tried to assault one woman in Epstein’s circle who was giving the film mogul a nonsexual massage.
Last September, French police asked for victims and witnesses to come forward for their own investigation into Epstein’s alleged abuse. Cops also raided Epstein’s Paris apartment and the offices of Karin Models, the agency of Epstein’s friend and his accused procurer of underage girls, Jean-Luc Brunel. According to Giuffre, Brunel once bought three French girls from their parents as a gift to Epstein. Brunel has denied Giuffre’s claims and any involvement with Epstein’s trafficking ring.
Maritza Vasquez, a former bookkeeper for Brunel’s MC2 agency, claimed in a 2010 deposition that Epstein and Brunel were trying to start a new company with a woman in Paris but the venture never materialized. Epstein provided instructions to Brunel “saying that he wanted to have the same contracts as… Donald Trump,” Vasquez added, referring to Trump’s shuttered modeling agency, “and that he wanted to have the same kind of benefits for the scouters.”
Meanwhile, Gratitude America bankrolled “Associazione MinD,” a psychology organization in Rome for two years in a row, with a $25,000 donation in 2018 and $60,000 in 2017. Associazione MinD did not return messages left by The Daily Beast.
“Epstein provided instructions to Brunel ‘saying that he wanted to have the same contracts as … Donald Trump ... and that he wanted to have the same kind of benefits for the scouters.’”
According to its website, the group “was born in 2015 from the idea of ​​3 young psychologists to promote knowledge of the psychological world, through clinical and training activities, using different artistic and creative forms.”
The other international donation, for $28,543, went to a ballet theater in Vilnius, Lithuania. One online directory of companies indicates the group is the Baltic Ballet Theater, which did not return an email seeking comment.
Gratitude America’s money appears to have come exclusively from a $10-million donation in 2015 from investor Leon Black, whom the attorney general of the U.S. Virgin Islands recently subpoenaed over his relationship with Epstein.
The charity, created in 2012, didn’t list expenditures until four years later. By then, Epstein’s accountant Richard Kahn had replaced Epstein as president of the group. The financier’s longtime personal attorney, Darren Indyke, was vice president, while U.S. Virgin Islands tax attorney Erika Kellerhals was secretary and treasurer. (Indyke and Kahn are the co-executors of Epstein’s more than $600-million estate.)
Gratitude America donated to several nonprofits linked to people in Epstein’s orbit—including the Junior Tennis Champions Center (JTCC) in College Park, Maryland, where Next modeling agency honco Faith Kates’ son worked. JTCC received $10,000 from Gratitude America in 2018 and $25,000 the year prior. Last year, Kates would only provide a vague comment on the JTCC donation, saying “My son volunteered in high school and I believe they gave back the donation.”

Related in U.S. News

Harvard’s Hasty Pudding theater troupe received $50,000 from Epstein in 2018, and another $50,000 in 2016. As we previously reported, Celina Dubin—the daughter of Epstein’s former girlfriend Eva Dubin and her husband Glenn, who was accused of sexual misconduct by Giuffre—was a member of the Hasty Pudding Institute. (The Dubins have denied Giuffre’s claims.)
The son of Epstein’s accountant George V. Delson, who prepared tax returns for the hedge-funder’s defunct C.O.U.Q. Foundation, solicited a $25,000 donation for the Shakespeare Theatre of New Jersey. Lawrence Delson, a professor at NYU and the Fashion Institute of Technology, serves on the theater’s board of trustees.
Bonnie Monte, the theater’s artistic director, said her organization knew nothing about the anonymous donor. “Lawrence did solicit the donation which we did not know anything about,” Monte told The Daily Beast. “We did try to do some research to find out where it came from. We never knew who the anonymous donor was until over a year later, after Jeffrey Epstein’s death.” Monte said she looked online but could only find an unrelated Florida-based veterans charity called Gratitude America.
Delson, who didn’t return messages, told Monte “in the interest of transparency, in case anybody asks,” that the $25,000 came from one of Epstein’s foundations. “I said who is Jeffrey Epstein?” Monte recalled replying, adding that she was “horrified” to learn who Epstein was and figured it was good his money was going to charity.
“She walked up to this French girl to show me how easy it was for her to procure girls.”
The latest tax filings for Epstein’s charity also reveal a $500,000 donation to the Kuhn Foundation, which received $150,000 from Epstein in 2017.
CNBC previously revealed Epstein agreed to provide $1.4 million in funding for a PBS science show created by Robert Kuhn called “Closer to Truth.” That show never got off the ground due to a lack of funding following Epstein’s suicide.
Kuhn told CNBC he met Epstein multiple times in New York and that a group of scientists, which he declined to name, introduced them. Kuhn claimed he didn’t know about the sexual abuse accusations against Epstein which he described as “totally reprehensible.” He added, “It is an example of the corruption of power distorts your own reality and then exercises this power over people who are psychologically defenseless.”
Epstein funded a slew of other organizations he’s backed over the years, including a $25,000 donation to the New School; $10,000 to the Crohn's & Colitis Foundation; and $35,000 to the Edge Foundation, a society of science and tech intellectuals which hosted the exclusive “Billionaires’ Dinners” Epstein attended.
Humanity Plus, a Los Angeles-based nonprofit which says it’s “dedicated to elevating the human condition” through technology, received $100,000 from Epstein in 2018. (The group previously operated as the World Transhumanist Association, which received $20,000 from another Epstein group in 2011.)
In a statement on its website, Humanity Plus said Gratitude America did not include Epstein’s name on the donation. “This donation of $100,000 was put to a good cause as evidenced in Humanity+ tax Schedule B, Part 1 that states the donation was granted to educational research and development of Artificial Intelligence, the ethical use of AI, and increasing awareness of how AI can benefit humanity,” the group said.
“This AI research is diametrically opposed to the exploitative and abusive behaviors of Mr. Epstein that were recently revealed in the news. At the time we accepted this donation from Gratitude America, Ltd., Humanity+ had no knowledge of Mr. Epstein’s horrific alleged criminal activity, and we strongly condemn it.”
In 2018, Gratitude America also donated $25,000 to the Cancer Research Wellness Institute (CRWI), a California nonprofit founded by the late Howard Straus, who was the son of alternative cancer therapy doctor Max Gerson. Epstein’s charity shelled out $75,000 to CRWI the year before.
Before he died in June 2019, Straus told The Daily Beast in an email that he’d never heard of Gratitude America or Epstein, and that he personally thanks donors no matter the size of their contributions. “A donation of that size would be the single largest donation we’ve ever seen, and believe me, we’d notice!” Straus wrote.
“I am president of CRWI, and can assure you we have NEVER received a donation of that magnitude from ANYONE. I would know,” Straus said.
“We are perennially short of funds, and would love to be the recipient of such largesse, but not from sexual predators,” Straus added, before apparently referring to President Trump, “like the Orange Shitgibbon or his imitators.’
— with additional reporting by Erin Zaleski and Barbie Latza Nadeau
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2020.09.04 21:50 -DooOooT-dOOoOOT- NCT Daily/ Variety shows Mark Lee cut

NCT Daily/JCC/N' series
Dream challenge Mark
NCT Dream Mark's graduation part Ep.4
HIT THE STATES Mark x Vancouver
HIT THE STATES Mark x LA
HIT THE STATES Haechan ft. Mark Botanical Garden
HIT THE STATES Jaehyun ft. Mark New York
NCT 127 24h Relay Cam Mark 12-1 am
NCT 127 24h Relay Cam Mark 6-7 pm ft. Yuta
NCT 127 Relay Cam Mark 12-1 pm
NCT 127 Late Night Punch Punch Show Ep.0 Mark, Jungwoo, Doyoung
Unboxing of NCT127 Neo Zone: The Final Round with Mark, Yuta, Doyoung
JCC Making Passport wallets with Mark and Johnny
JCC Sleepover with Doyoung, Mark, Johnny
JCC Aerial Yoga with Mark, Johnny
JCC Walking in New York with Mark, Johnny
JCC Making a mini movie with Mark, Johnny
JCC Freaky Handshake
JCC Indoor tent with Mark, Johnny
JCC Sunny Side Up with Mark, Johnny
JCC being florist with Mark
Haechan's Radio with Mark, Taeyong, Doyoung prt.1
Haechan's Radio with Mark, Taeyong, Doyoung prt.2
[N'60] Dream vs Dream Mark vs Haechan
It's Awkard but it's Okay Doyoung, Renjun ft Mark, Haechan prt.1
It's Awkard but it's Okay Doyoung, Renjun ft Mark, Haechan prt.2
A Cup of Coffee part.2 with Mark, Johnny, Ten, Jaehyun, Doyoung
[N'77] ISAC practice
[NEO CITY: LOG] Recorded by Mark english
Help! Johnny Marky english
[N'88] Cheryy Blossoms Vlog with Mark, Jaehyun, Doyoung
[N'103] EXO-SC Behind The Scenes with Mark, Taeil, Johnny
'To You' #1 Taeyong-Doyoung/ Doyoung-Mark / Mark-Haechan
'To You' #2 Mark-Haechan / Haechan-Jungwoo / Jungwoo-Johnny
NCT Beyond Live ad with Mark, Jungwoo, Doyoung
[N'136] Dream Cam
[N'112] NCT in Paris with Mark, Taeil, Doyoung
Johnny Marky helping Chenle contact with Stephen Curry prt.1
Johnny Marky helping Chenle contact with Stephen Curry prt.2
Johnny Marky helping Chenle contact with Stephen Curry prt.3
Taeil's Cooking Show ft. Mark, Jaehyun
[N'54] Osaka Roomates Mark-Jaemin / Chenle-Winwin Jisung-Jaehyun
[N'56] Osaka Ending Stage Full cam
[N'23] Mark Lee
NCT127 Neo Concert 127 seconds of Mark
Dear Dream
[N'9] Mark and his brothers
[N'3] So what? We hot, we young!
[N'16] Black Suit NCT Dream reaction
[N'21] Joy, Behind the scenes
[N'29] Boss behind the scenes in Ukraine
[N'31] Boss behind the scenes in Ukraine prt.2
[N'41] NCT with Harvey Mason Jr. and Marteen
[N'57] We Go Up behind the scenes
Out of NCT:
NCT Dream ysscom offical Mark cut
Josh and Ollie Konglishman interview Mark, Jaehyun
Josh and Ollie Konglishman interview uncut
Josh and Ollie reaction to SuperM
Josh and Ollie visits a NCT Concert Vlog
Knowing Bros (eng sub) cut
TvN Life Bar Mark
Henry Lau and Mark Lee Snowball project cuts
Xiumin Mark SM station Young and Free interview
Xiumin Mark SM station Young and Free interview prt.2
Dangereous Beyond the Blanket Playlist
NCT 127 Hello Counselor Mark, Jaehyun, Doyoung
Dingo Music appearance Mark, Jungwoo
Let's Eat together Mark
We Play Mark
Get to know: NCT's Mark! Asia Spotlight
SuperM
SuperM Setting up: We are the future Live
SuperM Ready to fly in LA
SuperM Story of Jopping
SuperM Behind MARK Album photoshoot
[Spoiler-MARK] Album unboxing
SM rookies content:
Mark , Haechan react to Red Velvet Hapiness
Music Core content
Playlist
Music Core Mark, Mina, Ong Seungwoo
Music Core interview
Fan favourite Youtube contents:
Mark Is Absolutely Fully Capable A Short Documentary @zeusnct
some of mark lee's most iconic quotes @ensi tea
[nct] mark lee's dictionary @eriezen
don't leave mark lee alone with a girl @bringbackstrony
Mark Lee vs Korean @biggesthit
Mark Lee is a disaster but that's why you like him @RENMIZU
mark being flustered for 7 minutes straight @softjun
everybody loves mark lee @softjun
NCT is whipped for mark lee @Banana Milk
mark lee speaks english and breaks my heart for 12 minutes @chanttalle
NCT MARK LEE VINES FOR 10 MINUTES AND 35 SECONDS STRAIGHT @Ai Vy Ngo
mark lee being his own species for 5 more minutes @NCT Quack
mark lee getting angry (in a cute way) @saturnhyuck
nct trying to kiss and baby mark lee (part one everybody loves mark lee) @byuntiful
Mark Lee's fast reflex A.K.A his spidey sense @Mineo Nam
Fan edits
Playlist
Vlogs about Mark Lee
Playlist
NCT Mark Lee 156 Vlog @Gelindigkeit
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2020.09.04 16:38 AshleighBSB [Boarding School Blues] - Chapter 32: Happy Thanksgiving

[Cover] [Chapter 1] [Table Of Contents] [Patreon] [Discord]
This is Book 4: Boarding School Break: Happy Thanksgiving.[Book 2: Boarding School Beginnings] [Book 3: Boarding School Boyfriends]

It’s almost Thanksgiving. In a few hours, my friends will be giving me a ride back to my house. I have not been home since Long Weekend, nearly two months ago. Wow. I just realized it’s been that long. Maybe because my family visited me a couple of weeks ago, or maybe just because I have been so busy with finals, I hadn’t noticed the time passing.
I have mixed feelings about going home. While it will be nice to see my family, and I am really looking forward to Thanksgiving dinner, I have become accustomed to seeing my friends every day. How am I supposed to go eleven whole days without them? Especially one of them?
Melinda’s mother greeted her with a hug before she even entered the house. “Happy Thanksgiving, and welcome home.”
Melinda’s father had been very busy at work and running late to retrieve Melinda from the Charles & Rachel Hartfield Preparatory School for Young Men and Women, a boarding school nearly two hours away from their Southern Connecticut home, so they were relieved when Melinda’s best friend, Walter Evans, had offered her a ride home earlier that day. Since his parents did not want to drive in the holiday traffic the evening before Thanksgiving, they had sent a car, which was currently driving back to the highway.
Melinda’s mother helped her carry her bags into the house, where they deposited them in the foyer while Melinda followed her mother to the kitchen.
“Your father decided to work late and your brother is having dinner at a friend’s house. I’ve been cooking all day. I so don’t want to make dinner. How does macaroni and cheese sound?”
“The orange kind in the blue box?” It was one of Melinda’s favorite foods.
Her mother made a face. “If you must. I was thinking the frozen kind.” She filled a pot with water to boil the pasta. “So, when you told me that Walter’s father was sending a car, you never mentioned it was going to be a limousine. I assumed you meant a regular car.”
Melinda settled into one of the kitchen chairs to watch her mother. “Oh, well, I think it was supposed to be a regular car. But, with three passengers and all our luggage, Mrs. Evans decided to order a bigger car when Walter told her I was coming.”
“I see. And how was your drive home?”
“Not bad. We hit some traffic, but we didn’t mind. There was a bag of cookies and some sodas. Walter ate most of it, but Pat and I managed to have a small snack.”
“Pat. That’s Walter’s brother, right?”
Melinda nodded and continued. “The car had a television, so we watched Neogenesis.”
“That strange science fiction show you like? You subjected your friends to that?”
“It’s just one of the many reasons Walter and I get along so well. Actually, both of our advisors are fans too, so they started a group. What did Mr. Peter’s call it? The NSFC, Neogenesis Science Fiction Club.”
“That is very…no. There are no words,” Melinda’s mother shook her head in amusement. “Who else is in this group?”
“Well, it was just Walter and me, but then Pat started attending when he came back to school after Parents’ Weekend.”
“Back to school? Where was he?”
The concerned look on her mother’s face was extremely telling. Two months ago, when Melinda had come for Long Weekend, she had discovered that her public school friends had undergone drastic transformations since beginning high school this past fall. Melinda knew her mother was aware of at least some of these changes and assumed she was envisioning Pat’s brother as some sort of delinquent who had started school more than halfway through the fall term because he had been in trouble.
Melinda took a deep breath. She knew this moment had been coming, but no amount of preparation could help her find the words. She understood, finally, how hard it had been for Walter to tell her so many weeks ago.
“Have I told you about Walter’s parents?” Melinda knew full well she had not.
“Don’t change the subject. Why was Pat not in school?”
“I promise, I’ll tell you. But, I have to start at the beginning. You see, Walter, you know his last name is Evans, right?” When her mother nodded, Melinda continued. “Well, his dad? He’s kinda Adam Evans. Like, from CAVEmen.”
Melinda’s mother just stared at her for a few moments. “Walter’s father is the lead guitarist for a rock band?”
Melinda nodded, then spoke quickly, realizing her mother had not yet made the connection. “Yeah, and that means his mother is Kara McGregor.”
This time, Melinda’s mother took a little longer to reply. “The child star.”
“Well, she’s not a kid anymore, but yeah. So, Walter’s siblings are sorta Meghan and Patrick McGregor.”
“The movie stars.”
“Pat missed the first part of the term because he was filming a movie in Hawaii.”
“He’s not a third-former, though. Isn’t he older than you? Why is he hanging around with younger students?”
Melinda smiled. “I asked him that, you know. I told you Walter was homeschooled? Well, because the kids were homeschooled, the family was usually able to be together when someone was filming a movie. For this last movie, when Pat was in Hawaii, Walter was back here in school. And, Meghan graduated last year and she’s living in New York now. Well, Pat really started to miss his brother, so when he got back to school, he wanted to spend some time with Walter. But, Walter wanted nothing to do with him. At least, not in public.”
“At your show,” her mother interrupted, referring to a dance performance in which Melinda had participated earlier that month, “you said Walter and his brother have a weird relationship. That Walter didn’t want to be seen with his brother.”
“They told me about the last time they tried to eat out in a restaurant. The boys, their parents, and their grandparents. Meghan wasn’t even with them. Long story. Anyway, they got bombarded by fans and they ended up having to take their dinners to go and eat in their van in a commuter lot. Walter lives with that every day. So, when he got to school, it was his shot at being normal. Pat feels the same way. School is someplace they don’t have to worry about being recognized.”
“Are you friends with Walter because of his family?”
Melinda actually smiled at the question. “That was Walter’s biggest fear this term, I think. But, one of the things Pat likes best about me is that I don’t see the movie star. Actually, I didn’t even notice when people started looking at me differently for being his girlfriend. He had to point it out to me.”
“You’re dating Patrick McGregor?”
Melinda closed her eyes and sighed a little. She had not intended to tell her mother about her relationship with Pat. At least, not yet. With a deep breath, she shook her head, telling her mother what she had told her friends the week before. “No. Patrick McGregor only exists in Hollywood. I’m with Pat Evans.”
“And how old is this boy again?”
Melinda was a little relieved that her mother was referring to him as this boy, and not focusing on the movie star. “He’s sixteen.”
“And you don’t think he’s a little old for you?”
“Oh, no, I do think he’s a little old for me. That’s one of the reasons I didn’t want to be his girlfriend.”
“What were the other reasons?”
Melinda thought about her ex-boyfriend, a boy from home her mother knew from church. “Well, Eliot and I were friends, and then he was my boyfriend and things didn’t really end well and then we weren’t friends anymore. Pat and I were friends, and I didn’t want the same thing to happen with him.”
Melinda’s mother said nothing as Melinda continued. “And, then there was Walter. He was hanging out with this girl we all hated, and I realized I was jealous of her. Not because I liked Walter, because I don’t. Not like that. I just thought she was taking away my best friend. And, I didn’t want Walter to feel that way towards his brother. Or to me.”
“Sounds like a lot of reasons not to be his girlfriend. So, why are you?”
Melinda shrugged. “I can’t explain it. When he holds me, I feel safe.”
“I’m not sure I’m comfortable knowing you’re dating a boy so much older than you. Boys that age, they want certain things out of a relationship. You’re only thirteen.”
Melinda tried not to whine. “Mooom! Pat and I have talked about this. I don’t want a…physical relationship with him. And, neither does he. He believes in saving all that for marriage.”
“He told you that?” Melinda could hear the skepticism in her mother’s voice as she watched her strain the pasta and returning it to the pan.
Melinda shrugged. “Yeah. He wanted to make sure that we both…understood each other’s intentions.”
“But, sweetie, how do you know he means it?”
Melinda made a face. “Why would he say it if he didn’t mean it?”
Her mother added milk and butter to the pan. “He’s an actor. A really good one. He could just be telling you what he thinks you want to hear.”
Melinda considered a moment, then shook her head. “I don’t think he is. I think he really means it. See, okay. He’s probably gonna be upset with me telling you, so please don’t ever let him find out I did. But, they’re a super religious family. I mean, Walter actually memorized the entire catechism as part of his homeschooling.”
Melinda’s mother raised her eyebrows. “He did?”
Melinda nodded. “Why do you think he’s my confirmation mentor? Anyway, Pat was telling me about this religious retreat he went on after his third form year. With Meghan, I think. There were a lot of talks about chastity and it really struck a chord with him. It’s something he really firmly believes in. He even has this little card he carries around in his wallet to remind him about the promise he made.”
“Promise?”
Melinda nodded. “Yeah. Signing this card is some kind of promise to God that he’s gonna save himself for marriage. I’m not sure I understand it, but since it means we’re thinking the same way, I didn’t really question it.”
Melinda’s mother looked unconvinced as she put the bowl of pasta on the table. “I’m still not comfortable with my thirteen-year-old dating a sixteen-year-old.”
“Well, the boys invited me over during break. Maybe I can go visit and you can get to know him a little better.”
“We’ll see. So, when do you get your report card?”
“The actual paper one will be mailed some time next week, I think. But, I know we can check our grades tonight. Actually,” Melinda glanced at the clock on the microwave. “I think they’re all in now.”
Melinda ran back to the foyer to retrieve her laptop, which she set up on the kitchen table. The student portal on the school website was not very mobile friendly and she hated accessing it from her phone. She logged in and found that each of her teachers were able to write comments on her performance for the term. Melinda was stunned as she examined her report.

ART 104 Drawing Basics Rockwell A I was extremely pleased with your final project. You have shown tremendous growth this term.
ART 701 Dance Nutmeg Ballet Co. P Melinda is an excellent dancer. We hope to see her next term.
ENG 101 Third Form English Johnson A- Melinda has made amazing progress this term. She has shown great improvement in her essay writing and always provides excellent journal entries. She offers insightful comments during class discussions and is a pleasure to have in class.
LATIN 101 Latin I Henderson A- Melinda is a joy to have in class. I love her enthusiasm. She should work on her vocabulary building to improve her sight-reading abilities.
MAT 250 Honors Geometry Davidson A Melinda has a good understanding of the material.
MUS 751 Wind Orchestra Williams P Melinda has shown improvement. Remember to tighten your embouchure.
SCI 151 Honors Physics Wilson A Melinda had a rough start this term but has shown tremendous progress. I look forward to working with her this winter.
At the bottom of the page was a note from her advisor:
I have watched Melinda work pertinaciously throughout the term. I have also seen her interacting with several of her peers. Unlike many third form students, Melinda has seemed to find a constructive balance between her work and play, and her hard work seems to have paid off, as her grades have earned her recognition on this trimester’s Dean’s List.
Clarissa Price
Melinda was unable to do anything besides stare at her computer. How had she managed to get straight A’s? She had studied so diligently, but always felt as if she were struggling to understand the material.
Melinda ate her pasta absently as she replayed the last three months in her head. She recalled that by the end of September, she had resolved to remain at least one day ahead in her homework assignments for each class. And, she had made sure to check in with her teachers if she didn’t understand something. She supposed, upon further reflection, she had noticed by the end of the semester that the work had seemed easier. And she had felt her finals were pretty easy, although many of her friends had seemed to struggle.
Melinda’s mother approached the table, wiping her hands on a dishtowel. “Are your grades there?”
“Um, yeah.” Melinda turned the computer so her mother could view the report herself. Meanwhile, Melinda used her phone to check on the definition of embouchure, realizing her orchestra teacher wanted her to work on the way her mouth was shaped when she was playing her flute.
As she began to eat, she looked up dean’s list, a term she knew she had heard, but had never understood. It took a little research, including a trip to the school’s handbook, before she realized she had made the school’s honor roll.
“Straight A’s? And Dean’s List? Oh, Melinda. I’m so proud of you. I was worried all these boys were going to hurt your grades, but I see your advisor believes you have juggled your school work and social life well.”
“So, does that mean I can visit Walter and Pat over break?”
“We’ll see,” her mother echoed her earlier words, but this time she was smiling.

Melinda was not surprised that her family was the first to arrive at Nonna and Papa’s house Thanksgiving Day. Melinda’s mother carried in her huge antipasto tower while Melinda carried in the smaller version her mother had made for the kids table. Her father brought her eleven-year-old brother, Joey, in the back yard to play catch in the unseasonably warm weather.
Melinda followed her mother into the house and down the hall into the kitchen, greeting Nonna as they entered.
“Happy Thanksgiving!”
“Happy Thanksgiving! You can put that on the table, there.” Nonna nodded to the kitchen table as she wiped her hands on her apron. “How are you?”
Nonna hugged Melinda and her mother, giving each a peck on the cheek, before returning to the stove to stir the pot of sauce. Melinda’s mother looked around.
“How can we help?” Melinda’s mother asked.
“I think everything is all set.” Nonna scanned the room. “Yup. Just waiting on the boys.”
Melinda’s mother had two brothers, both of whom were married with children, but Nonna always referred to them as the boys. Melinda sat at the table watching her mother stir the sauce and Nonna busy herself around the kitchen as she talked to Melinda.
“So, how’s school?”
Melinda shrugged. “It was kinda hard at first, but it’s not bad. I’m enjoying it.”
“She made Dean’s List.” Melinda could hear the pride in her mother’s voice. “And she has a boyfriend.”
“Boyfriend? Is he Italian?” Melinda knew that Nonna was proud that her grandchildren were so smart, especially Melinda and Joey, who had both skipped a grade in school. But, Nonna had been raised in a strict Italian-American household and wanted all her grandchildren to marry into good Italian families.
“Well, he’s Irish. But, we go to church together every Sunday.”
“Not Italian, but Irish is not bad. He’s a good boy.”
“He’s sixteen.” There was a tone of disapproval in Melinda’s mother’s voice.
“Joseph is older than you.”
“Yes, but we met after college. Three years is a big deal in high school.”
Melinda was saved from further interrogation by the arrival of Uncle Tony and Aunt Francesca, who poured out of their minivan with three daughters, two trays of stuffed mushrooms, and a bubbling baby girl Melinda had yet to meet.
Hugs were exchanged and Melinda brought the trays of mushrooms straight to the dining room, since they were the first course. Then, Melinda was charged with holding the baby, Sophia, while the other little girls ran around outside with the guys. Uncle Marco arrived with Aunt Lily a few moments later, carrying a large tray of yams and a rambunctious little boy, who was banished to the backyard with his cousins and uncles.
It was not long before Nonna called everyone to the table, but it did take a while to be seated, especially at the kids table. No one wanted to sit next to the two four-year-olds, both of whom had a reputation of being extremely messy eaters. Eventually, as the family settled down, Melinda ended up beside her oldest cousin, Viola, who was in the same grade as Joey, even though she was a year older than he. Across from Melinda, Joey was seated beside Viola’s eight-year old sister, with the four-year-olds at either head. Melinda had placed a sleeping Sophia back into her carrier during the meal.
The family joined hands to say their traditional table blessing, and then began to eat. There was a lot of conversation over the stuffed mushrooms, which only Uncle Tony’s children ate, as the other children disliked them. It was not long, however, before Papa was wandering around the room carrying small bowls, each holding a stuffed artichoke. Melinda and Viola were the only children to request one.
Viola tore off a leaf and sucked on the stuffing before scraping it with her teeth and throwing the leaf in a large bowl between her and Melinda. “So, my mom says you live at your school. What’s that like?”
Melinda shrugged. “It’s not bad. I like it. There’s lots to do and I’ve made some really nice friends.”
“But, do you have to do homework all the time, or do you get to have some fun?”
“Oh, there’s lots of things to do. I did dance as my sport and that was really fun. And on the weekends, my friends and I go into town or go to the mall. There’s a movie theater in the mall, so we’ve gone there a couple of times.”
“Really? Have you seen Romeo and Juliet? I love Jarrod Handy. Oh, and Patrick McGregor was in it, too. It was probably the best movie ever.”
“Patrick McGregor goes to her school,” Joey announced. “I got his autograph.”
“OMG! Really? That is so cool. Do you have any classes with him?”
Melinda responded cautiously. “No. He’s a fifth, I mean, he’s in the eleventh grade. But, we’re friends.”
“Really?” asked Joey. “I didn’t know that. Hey, Mom!” Joey shouted to the nearby adult table. “Did you know Melinda was friends with Patrick McGregor?”
“Yes, I did.”
Viola was wiggling excitedly in her seat, her artichoke nearly forgotten. “Have you met his girlfriend? I was reading last night that he’s with Poppy Sommers now. Does she go to your school too? What’s she like? What’s he like?”
“I hadn’t heard that.” Melinda’s fingers started shaking nervously as she brought the next leaf to her mouth. She figured it was time to change the subject. “So, how’s everything with you?”

It was not long before Papa cleared the artichoke dishes and Melinda’s mother brought in her trays towering with layers of meat, cheese, and olives. While the adults simply spooned great helpings onto their plates, the children picked out what they wanted to eat, leaving the hard-boiled eggs for the four-year-olds.
Melinda spent the entire course wondering what her cousin had read and whether she should bother mentioning the rumor to Pat. Of course it was a rumor, she assured herself. Pat would never cheat on her. But, a lingering doubt made her olives taste a little more sour than usual.
Nonna went around the room asking everyone how many manicotti they each wanted. Melinda, Viola, and Joey each requested one, but none of the other children did.
None of the children wanted the salad course, and Melinda was elected to hold Sophia, who had woken from her nap, and feed her a bottle. Melinda enjoyed playing with her three-month-old cousin, who was most excited when she was being held. Playing with her cousin helped her forget about the rumor Viola had mentioned.
Finally, it was time for the main course. Papa carved the turkey and placed it on plates. The children brought their plates to the adult table for their parents to fill with mashed potatoes, gravy, corn, stuffing, broccoli casserole, and yams, complete with walnuts, apples, and mini-marshmallows. There was a basket of dinner rolls on their table when they returned.
Nonna volunteered to hold the baby, allowing Melinda to eat her dinner in as much peace as possible, with the children around her yelling at each other. Melinda only half-listened to the arguments, trying to avoid thinking about Pat.

After dinner, the children were sent into the living room to watch Christmas movies while Papa, who was supposed to be watching them, took a nap. Melinda was permitted to stay in the kitchen, provided she hold the baby. Since the baby had fallen back asleep, she was able to text Walter.
Melinda had received her first text from Walter before breakfast, when he asked about her grades. After replying, congratulating her on Dean’s List, and informing her he had done equally well, although he did not have any A-minuses, he continued to text her every hour to ask what course she was on. He had been fascinated the night before when she described the seven-course meal during their drive home. Meanwhile, Walter was describing some of the antics occurring at his home.
Walter’s mother was the second youngest of six children, all of whom were married with multiple children of their own. His father only had one brother, Vinny, and their parents lived in a retirement community in Florida, so Vinny and his family always joined the McGregor holiday celebrations. A lot of Walter’s cousins were married with children of their own running around. Their father’s fourth bandmate and his family had also attended, adding to the chaos.
Melinda was enjoying the stories when the baby began to stir.
“Hey, Aunt Francesca?”
“What’s up, sweetie?”
“Sophia is kinda fussing. I think she’s trying to stay asleep, but it’s a little loud in here. Do you think I can take her into the back bedroom?”
“That’s a good idea. Here. Here’s her bottle. If she wakes up or fusses, you can give her the rest of it. Oh. I haven’t changed her in a while.”
“I can do it when she wakes up. I know how.”
“Fantastic. Take the diaper bag. I wish Viola was as good a babysitter as you.”
Melinda smiled at the complement as she carried her cousin into a spare bedroom in the back of the house. She settled herself onto the bed, snuggling the baby in her arms.
A moment later, her video chat signaled an incoming call. She answered it, keeping the volume low.
Pat greeted her with the smile that had helped make him a famous movie star. “Hey, Daphne.”
“I thought her name was Melinda.” Melinda recognized the off-screen voice as belonging to Meghan, his equally famous sister.
Melinda smiled back as she heard Walter explain. “It’s his stupid pet name for her. Based on some Greek myth.”
“Hey you guys,” Melinda greeted them. “How’s the chaos?”
“We’re hiding,” Walter announced proudly as Pat angled his phone in such a way that Melinda could see all three of them. “Dinner’s over and no one will leave. Some are talking about staying over.”
Melinda giggled. “How was dinner?”
“Not bad,” Pat replied. “I got Walter to try Mom’s colcannon.”
“How was it?” Melinda knew her friend had been weary of the dish.
Walter grinned. “It has so much butter and cream, you can’t even taste the cabbage.”
“He had three helpings.” Meghan sounded a little grossed out.
“Only three?” Melinda was half serious, knowing her friend had a voracious appetite.
“He ate an entire apple pie,” Pat said.
“You didn’t!”
“No, I did,” Walter said sheepishly. “How are things over there? What course are you on?”
“We’re in between dinner and dessert. The kids are all watching TV, but I snuck away.” She angled the camera to show her cousin. “I’m babysitting.”
“Oh!” cooed Meghan. “She’s so cute! She’s a new baby.”
“Three months, I think. My aunt is letting me care for her.”
“Okay. Game time,” Pat announced with a smile. Melinda knew the Evans family loved to play games, especially the boys.
“Oh, I’ll let you go.”
“No. You’re playing. Stupidest dinner conversations. Me first. I overheard the Connors arguing over whose hair was redder.”
“You’re joking!”
Meghan laughed. “No, he’s not. They’re…I forgot. Six and seven, I think? Our cousins’ kids. I know they’re close in age. Anyway, I overheard their argument, marched between them and said I won. Then I walked away.”
Melinda tried not to wake the baby as she laughed. “Okay. That beats my stupid dinner conversation. My brother and my oldest cousin, they’re both in the seventh grade. They got into a debate about who was the first president.”
“There’s a debate?” asked Pat. “I thought it was obvious. John Hanson.”
Meghan shook her head. “No. Peyton Randolph.”
Walter sent a quizzical look at his siblings. “What happened to George Washington?”
“Wait. How is this something Walter doesn’t know?” melinda was surprised, since Walter had the reputation among their friends of being the most knowledgeable and having all the answers.
“John Hanson was the first president under the Articles of Confederation,” Pat explained, “which were the government after America declared independence and before the Constitution was ratified, making George Washington president.”
“But,” Meghan countered, “Peyton Randolph was president of the Continental Congress, which is the government that was in charge before the Articles of Confederation were passed.”
“Yeah, I think that was the argument my brother was trying to make,” Melinda agreed. “But, he didn’t have all those details, which made his point a little fuzzy.”
“I got one,” Meghan announced. “Uncle Liam asked me how school was going. I told him I was taking a year off. He said, Oh, before you start high school?”
“How do you take a year off before high school?” Melinda asked.
“We were homeschooled,” Walter reminded her. “He probably thought Meghan was taking a year at home before going to school.”
“Maybe he said the wrong word?”
“No, he really thought I was only twelve.”
“You look twelve,” Pat informed her.
Meghan playfully punched her brother. “Okay, Walter. You’re up.”
Walter thought for a moment. “Nope. I was too busy eating. I don’t think I heard any conversations.”
Everyone laughed and Joey bounded into the room, plopping himself beside Melinda. Sophia stirred, but did not wake as Melinda drew her closer.
“Nonna says dessert’s ready. What’cha watching?” He looked over her shoulder to better see the screen.
“Nothing. I’m just saying hi to my friends.”
“But, you’re watching a movie. That’s Patrick and Meghan McGregor.”
“And, you’ve met Walter.” Melinda turned her attention back to her phone.
“Hey, Joey. What’s for dessert?” Walter asked with a smile.
“Oh, the usual. Cannoli, apple pie, pumpkin pie. Probably some cheesecake. Cookies.”
Melinda smiled at the thought. “I like the green leaves with the chocolate inside.”
“Now I’m hungry again,” Walter announced. “I wonder if there’s more pie.”
Meghan punched her brother lightly on the shoulder as Melinda started giggling. Pat brought the phone close so Melinda could no longer see the other Evans siblings.
“Text me later?” Pat blew her a kiss before ending the call.
Joey stared at his sister. “I don’t get it. Why is Walter with them?”
“Walter’s their brother.” Melinda was trying to get off the bed and store her phone without waking the still-sleeping baby.
“But, why did Patrick McGregor want you to text him?”
Sophia whimpered. “Joey! You woke her up!”
Melinda bounced the baby gently, fumbling in the diaper bag for the bottle.
“But, he blew you a kiss!”
“Yes, he did. He’s my boyfriend.”
Melinda got the top off the bottle and was able to shove it into the baby’s mouth before she reached full-blown wailing. She continued to bounce and rock slightly to calm the baby and lull her back to sleep.
Joey shook his head. “No, he’s not. Poppy Sommers is. It’s all over the internet.”
Melinda dropped the bottle and the baby fussed for a moment while Melinda tried to shove it back into her mouth. When she did respond to her brother, she wasn’t entirely polite.
“I haven’t seen what you’re talking about. All I know is that Pat and I have been together for about a week and a half. Maybe what you saw was older than that.”
“You’re serious? He’s really your boyfriend? Does Mom know?”
Melinda rolled her eyes as she headed for the doorway, the baby already half-asleep again.
“Yes, she does. But, I’d rather no one else know. So, don’t say anything about it. Deal?”
“But…”
“Deal?” Melinda raised her voice as much as she dared without waking the baby.
“Fine,” Joey mumbled as he walked past Melinda to return to the dining room.

[Table Of Contents] [Chapter 33]
Follow follow Patrick McGregor's story in Confessions of a Teenage Celebrity - Chapter 8: Finals (Part 2)
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LESBIAN SCRIPTED SERIES New York Girls TV  Pilot Episode ... New York Girls TV  Ep 405 'The Resurrection' New York Girls TV  Ep 407 'It's About Time' - YouTube NYGTV S3 E3: 'Out With the Old...' New York Girls Tv - YouTube New York Girls TV  204: Lions, Tigers & Snakes - YouTube New York Girls TV  Ep 402: It's a Small World - YouTube

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  1. LESBIAN SCRIPTED SERIES New York Girls TV Pilot Episode ...
  2. New York Girls TV Ep 405 'The Resurrection'
  3. New York Girls TV Ep 407 'It's About Time' - YouTube
  4. NYGTV S3 E3: 'Out With the Old...'
  5. New York Girls Tv - YouTube
  6. New York Girls TV 204: Lions, Tigers & Snakes - YouTube
  7. New York Girls TV Ep 402: It's a Small World - YouTube
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